We all want a happy and contented home, but we also know how quickly a peaceful home can turn into a tense one. Gail Smith has some practical tips that could help keep your household a happy and safe environment for your children.
Read MoreIn today's world, our children can face many challenges when it comes to body image. It's important to help them develop a positive view of themselves. Gail Smith explains why this is so crucial and offers tips on how you can support your child in this process.
Read MoreParenting can get tricky, especially when dealing with difficult behaviour. Check out Gail Smith’s suggestions on handling those challenging moments with your child.
Read MoreIt’s a natural part of life to feel anger. We need to understand that a child can often misinterpret our anger and will often take on much of the blame when we have a meltdown. Managing our anger around children is the best way to ensure your feelings do not overpower your child. Our angry outbursts can sometimes lead them to shut down and to avoid being in our presence.
Read on for some thoughts on how your anger can influence your child.
Read MoreI know it’s hard if there are risks, but, teach your child to have a go and to be a risk-taker. Read on for some advantages of this.
Read MoreFor some children, school can be challenging on many different levels. This blog aims to provide emotional support and practical strategies for parents to navigate the ups and downs of their children's school lives.
Read MoreEveryone experiences moments like these as a parent. Here are a few tips to keep positive and that making mistakes is all part of parenting.
Read MoreBullying is a serious issue. Here's a few parenting tips on how to keep focused of the issue of bullying.
Read MoreHere are some parenting suggestions to help children work through and potentially overcome their fears.
Read MoreHere are some suggestions on keeping your children’s stress levels at bay or at least contained in a manageable package. However, we recognise that stress factors operate around us all the time. Developing tactics to deal with them is the key.
Read MoreChildren have a right to feel safe. The importance of feeling safe is critical to a healthy society and mental health. Small steps can be used to help your child feel safe and secure and small things can make them feel unsafe, even in their own home. Read here for some parenting tips and considerations.
Read MoreMany children have times when they feel they are struggling not just with school but also with friends, home issues, siblings, etc. Children can and do have down times. If your child is struggling, read here for some tips.
Read MoreGo with the flow! If we remain rigid in how we organise our lives, we will only experience disappointment and this will add to diminishing your mental health.
Read MoreIn today's world, we tend to worry and feel the stress of everything occurring around us. Children quickly pick up our emotional dispositions and this can induce their own form of worrying about us as a stable source of reliability. Read here for some thoughts that invite us to hold a positive, hopeful disposition that acts as a stable framework for our children. Gail Smith, The Primary Years.
Read More1. Are you someone that tries hard to make everything right all the time? If this is the case you must be on overdrive during the lockdown. I would say quite exhausted. Try easing off a little. Are there things you can simply not do? These are unusual times and require unusual approaches. A little less can be better.
We have all said that we are in a new norm. Consider putting less pressure on yourself by not demanding as much from yourself and the children. Accept that the world has changed. Less mental clutter from expecting too much will ease the tension for everyone. Mental clutter comes from too much to think about without eliminating any of the worries on your mind.
2. When exercising with the kids, try setting little goals.
‘Today we will ride to the park and tomorrow will we will cycle a bit further around the creek”.
Here it is all about shifting the goal posts a little and motivating the children to do better and achieve a little more. It certainly gets the enthusiasm going for everyone. We all need something like a small challenge to get us motivated.
3. Children thrive on routine and feel so secure when they know what is happening. Put a set plan into the day with school work, lunch, etc. all planned. At the end of the day, it is recreation and fun time. It certainly is a motivator for the children. Involve them in the plan and assess how it all went after the day or the week. They will feel comfortable and secure with the routine and look forward to their free time to stretch their legs.
4. Unclutter. Keep the day simple and the house even simpler. The more we clutter, the more we think we have things to do. When you break away from the house for a walk etc. note how things just fade away.
5. Now is not a time to be extraordinarily disciplined and in control of everything. There is enough mental discipline coming from our lockdown instructions. Loosen up a little and enjoy the experience of just being family. Afterall it is such an extraordinary time to be together. Try and savour this time which will never come back again in the same format. Treasure it.
“Tough times don’t last. But tough people do.”
There is an old saying which says, “If mama isn’t right, the whole house isn’t right.” Here we mean that keeping yourself well and feeling mentally on top of things is critical for the mental health of the whole family. You, the parent is a major driver in the mental health of the family.
No pressure I hear you say loud and clear!
Here are some thoughts on keeping mentally healthy during these difficult times where we feel so unsettled and disillusioned by the news we hear on a daily basis about the pandemic.
Watch out for the triggers in your life that will unsettle you easily. We all have buttons once pressed that make us feel unhappy, angry disappointed, etc. If you can recognise those triggers then perhaps you can avoid them. This may mean some restructuring in your day, perhaps avoiding the news, conversations etc. When you think about it, there are occasions and situations that will bring you into an unsettled state. Seek out ways to avoid them. It could be as simple as not watching the news, reading the paper, not discussing the daily numbers with the virus, etc.
Take care not to blame yourself when things go wrong. This can happen easily when you are feeling down. For example, if your child doesn’t complete work online do not immediately see yourself as the bad parent. The more we see ourselves as the one to take the blame, the less capable we are to manage the situation effectively. Very quickly we begin to spiral down and only see the negative in situations. You are not the source of all problems and circumstances often outside your control dictate outcomes!
Try to focus on the positive. Today is sunny, this means Spring is coming and we can do more activities outside. Sometimes just reflecting on the simple positives just cheer you up. This does require developing a mindset that looks to the positive. When you start thinking that way you begin to have more gratitude for the good things around you and this shrinks negative feelings.
Be conscious of developing unhealthy coping skills. This can mean going to places and comfort zones that give us short term relief. Of course, alcohol would be in this category.
Think about what really works for you that makes you happy. Everyone is different in this area. Some people love yoga, others like to jog, cook, read, sew etc. The more you gravitate and feed your personal passions the better you feel.
Ensure you find yourself in situations where you get rewarded. It is important to hear affirmation from those around you. Of course, your children are a wonderful source of showing you how much they love you. Never underestimate the power of hearing positive talk about yourself. After all you are worth it!
Treat yourself to little indulgences. Some people love a bath, some enjoy a quiet time in the garden etc. Your personal space is very necessary to rejuvenate the spirit. If flowers make you feel happy, buy some each week.
Finally, talk to friends. There is nothing more enjoyable than simply having conversations with those that you value most in life.
Remind yourself that powers outside your control have led to our pandemic situation. We are just trying to create an environment that brings some light and joy into a difficult situation. However, in order to be a giver of joy, we must look after ourselves first in whatever way works for you.
“Talk to yourself like you would to someone you love.”