Ten Steps to more effective parenting

Here is a checklist to help you reflect on some good parenting habits. As parents we are not perfect and sometimes changing life situations have a way of limiting our ability to do our best. However, it is worth checking in to see how you can from time to time improve on your parenting style. You will probably surprise yourself that you are doing a great job!

Consider:

• Always keep up boosting your child’s sense of self-worth. They need to feel valued. If it comes from you it is special.

• Notice the times when you can reward them. We call this catching them when they are good. This can be for little things, ‘How clever you are to open that box. It seems tightly sealed.’

• Setting boundaries are important. A child feels safer with boundaries and needs to be clear with the directions you give them. Try not to overload them with too many directions and instructions.

• Always find time for your child. They grow quickly but need your constant presence in their life especially when they are young.

• Your image with your child is critical if you want them to follow your values. Your modelling will have a big impact on how they see and interpret the world.

• Always work hard to make communication a key feature of your relationship. Find the time to talk to them and listen with sensitivity to what they have to say.

• As a parent you will need to be flexible and open to frequent changes. A child’s life is not static and prepare to grow yourself as a parent over the years.

• To show that your love is unconditional having a strong and constant presence in their life is so important. You will, from time to time be disappointed but your love does not come with conditions.

• Try to introduce some regular patterns into family life. This could be the ritual of a family meal together, reading at bed time etc. Children find ritual comforting.

• Try to be a positive person. We know that sound mental health can be directly linked to having a positive disposition. A child feels more secure around a happy parent.

• Try not to make judgements too quickly when your child talks to you about challenging situations. They need to feel safe talking to you without feeling that you will disapprove.

All our children ask of us is to be the best we can. That means being authentic, accepting your mistakes and treating them with the dignity and care that you wish for yourself.

“Parenthood... it’s about guiding the next generation and forgiving the last.’”

— Peter Krause

Happy Mother’s Day

Let’s think about how you, as the mum, are so valuable to your child. Here are ten ways that you show so much love.

• Unconditional Love: Mothers show unwavering love and support, teaching their children the true meaning of unconditional love. We love them no matter what!

• Incredible Multi-tasking Skills: From juggling schedules to managing household chores, mothers are masters of multitasking, keeping everything running smoothly.

• Nurturing Nature: Mothers have a natural ability to nurture and care for their children, providing comfort, guidance, and encouragement every step of the way.

• Endless Patience: Despite the chaos of daily life, mothers exhibit remarkable patience, handling tantrums, setbacks, and challenges with grace and understanding.

• Superhuman Strength: Whether it's carrying a child for nine months or lifting spirits during tough times, mothers showcase incredible strength, both physically and emotionally.

• Role Model Extraordinaire: Mothers serve as powerful role models, inspiring their children to dream big, work hard, and never give up on their goals.

• Master Problem Solver: From fixing broken toys to solving complex problems, mothers have a knack for finding creative solutions to any challenge that comes their way.

• Unparalleled Sacrifice: Mothers make countless sacrifices for their children, often putting their own needs aside to ensure the happiness and well-being of their family.

• Infinite Kindness: With hearts full of kindness and compassion, mothers spread love and kindness wherever they go, making the world a better place for everyone around them.

• Eternal Bond: The bond between a mother and child is truly special and unbreakable, filled with moments of joy, laughter, and endless memories to cherish forever.

‘A mother’s love perceives no impossibilities.’

                                      -Cornelia Paddock

Let take a good look at why boredom can be a good thing

Our children at times are so overactive not to mention the incredible hours they put into their social media etc. If we can encourage our children to learn that less can sometimes be better and it can be quite a skill to learn how to do it.

Consider these ideas below that invite us to reflect on how healthy and positive, boredom can be in our life.

1. Creativity and Imagination:

   Boredom can spark creativity and imagination, leading to innovative problem-solving skills and a deeper appreciation for the arts. Just leave lots of magazines, interesting books and crayons around the house. Let their boredom discover what they can do.

2. Self-Discovery:

   Downtime without structured activities allows children to explore their interests and passions independently, uncovering hidden talents and hobbies. Let them roam through the garden, look outside the window etc. In order for them to be reflective, they need to just slow down

3. Resilience and Patience:

   Facing boredom can teach kids to be more patient and resilient when dealing with challenges or waiting for rewards in school and life. Sitting and waiting is something we all should learn to practice.

4. Enhanced Focus:

   Occasional boredom can improve a child's ability to concentrate, making them more effective at studying and completing assignments. We all need to learn patience and be prepared to wait our turn.

5. Stress Reduction:

   Unstructured time can reduce stress, anxiety, and the pressures of constant scheduling, benefiting a child's mental health and overall well-being. Don’t be anxious if schedules are not complete or you are late occasionally. Slowing down is healthy.

6. Quality Family Time: 

   Consider the importance of boredom in allowing for quality family time, during which parents and children can bond, have meaningful conversations, and create lasting memories. Idle conversations and no particular agenda when together can be a creative time for families.

7. Self-Directed Learning:

   Children can engage in self-directed learning during their unstructured moments, exploring topics that pique their curiosity and contributing to their academic growth. Teachers always give children unstructured time and it is well appreciated by the students.

Not filling every moment with activities allows the brain to slow down and recover from busy directions and messages. It also creates a wonderful space that can be filled by new thoughts, ideas and dreams.

‘Allow a little boredom into your child’s life and see how it works for them’

- Gail J Smith

Unlocking Creativity: Fun and Imaginative Activities for Parents to Inspire Their Children

Be creative with your child. It is a wonderful way to engage and to do things together that are memorable and intellectually stimulating.

Consider:

• Embark on storytelling adventures with your child. This could involve creating collaborative stories where each family member adds a sentence or taking turns inventing characters and plot twists. This is great for language development as well.

• Provide ideas for artistic exploration, such as setting up a "creation station" with various art supplies and letting your child experiment with different mediums and techniques. It doesn’t need to be tidied up regularly.

• Share simple and safe science experiments that you can do with your child at home. From creating homemade volcanoes to experimenting with colour-changing potions, these hands-on activities will spark curiosity and encourage scientific exploration.

• As a family go on outdoor nature hunts, where your child can use their senses to explore the natural world around them. Consider creating scavenger hunt lists or nature bingo cards to guide their exploration and encourage observation skills. Give them a magnifying glass to explore what’s in the grass. It is great fun.

• There are so many benefits of dramatic play in fostering creativity and imagination. As the parent you can set up themed dress-up corners or provide props and costumes for children to act out their own stories, plays, or adventures.

• Consider musical exploration by exposing your child to a variety of musical genres and instruments. From creating homemade instruments to having dance parties, there are endless opportunities for musical discovery and expression.

• Share kid-friendly cooking and baking recipes that parents can make with their children. Cooking together not only teaches valuable life skills but also encourages creativity and experimentation in the kitchen. Creating mess can be a healthy thing!

• Consider building and construction challenges using materials like LEGO, blocks, or recycled materials. You can challenge your child to build tall towers, intricate structures, or imaginative worlds, fostering spatial reasoning and problem-solving skills. Find a safe and suitable space in the house to

  spread out with all the blocks.

• As the parent, offer tips for creating imaginative play spaces within the home, such as building forts, creating sensory bins, or transforming cardboard boxes into playhouses. These dedicated spaces provide your child with opportunities for open-ended play and imaginative exploration.

• Cultivate a love for reading and storytelling by sharing a variety of books and stories with your child. Engage your child in discussions about characters, settings, and plot lines, inspiring their imagination and creativity. Try dramatizing sections of the book.

It is amazing how you the parent can inspire your child to be imaginative and creative. Look within your own home to find ways and means to be creative. You do not need to look far.

“A creative, imaginative child has an insatiable appetite for learning.”

— -Gail J Smith

Nurturing a Growth Mindset in Your Child

In simple terms this is all about encouraging positivity and a belief in your child’s ability to be an achiever.

Consider the following:

• Explain to your child the concept of a growth mindset versing a fixed mindset, highlighting the importance of believing in one's ability to improve through effort and practice.

• As a parent celebrate when your child tackles a difficult task or shows resilience in the face of challenges. Let them see that effort is rewarding.

• As the parent, help your child re frame statements like "I can't do this" to "I can't do this yet," emphasizing the idea of growth and progress over time. It’s about never say never.

• As the parent model a growth mindset in your own life. Share stories of your own challenges and successes, demonstrating perseverance and a positive attitude towards learning.

• Parents can provide constructive feedback to their child that focuses on effort, progress, and specific actions rather than fixed traits or abilities. Use phrases like, "I noticed you worked really hard on that" or "What strategies did you try?"

• Set realistic, achievable goals that align with your child’s interests and abilities. Involve your child in the goal-setting process and celebrate milestones along the way. All goals should be reasonable.

• Provide a supportive home environment that encourages exploration, curiosity, and a love for learning. This could include having a designated study space, providing access to educational resources, and engaging in activities that foster creativity and critical thinking.

• Re frame mistakes as valuable learning opportunities rather than failures. Discuss strategies for helping your child learn from their mistakes, such as problem-solving, reflection, and seeking help when needed. Making mistakes is a human process.

• Celebrate your child's growth and progress, no matter how small. This could involve creating a growth mindset journal where children document their achievements and areas of improvement or holding a "growth mindset celebration" to recognize efforts.

• Offer consistent support, encouragement, and reassurance to your child as they navigate challenges and strive for growth. Not everything will be perfect but their efforts are given much encouragement.

As your child grows they need to grow with a positive mindset where there is much personal belief and a sense that all is possible.

“Courage to continue matters more than success or failure”

— Winston Churchill

What brings joy to you and your child?

It doesn’t take much for a child to feel joy. We can always help them feel that joy by our own actions. The more we share that joy the deeper and richer connection we make with our child. It also makes us very happy. It triggers a host of significant physiological and psychological changes that improves our physical and mental health.

 Here are some examples of what brings joy to your child. Embrace it!

1. Seeing Your Child Laugh and Play Is Pure Joy

   Watching your child burst into giggles while playing with their favourite toy or sharing a fun moment with friends at the park. Laugh with them. Feel the muscles move in your chest and enjoy the moment together.

2. Their Smile Brightens Up Your Day

   When your child greets you with a big, toothy grin after school, or when they proudly show you a drawing they made. Notice how enlivening is their smile and how it makes you feel so much better.

3. Hearing Their Stories and Ideas Fills Your Heart with Joy

   When your child excitedly tells you about their day at school, recounts a funny story, or shares their imaginative ideas for a new adventure.

   Listen to what they have to say. There is so much joy in the way they express themselves and how they see the world.

4. Celebrating Milestones and Achievements Is a Source of Happiness

   Witnessing your child take their first steps, reading their first book, or seeing them receive a certificate for a school accomplishment. With each milestone you know that your child is well on the way to being an independent individual. That should bring a smile to your face.

5. Quality Time Together Creates Special Memories and Joy

   Enjoying a family game night, going on a nature hike, or having a cosy movie night complete with popcorn and snuggles. Find those special moments as a family. They don’t have to be large or complex. Make them spontaneous occasions where you can be together without any outside pressure. Build it into your week. Make it a family ritual that you get together and have some form of quality time.

6. Supporting Their Passions and Interests Brings Joy to Both of You

   Encouraging your child's love for art by setting up a mini art studio at home or helping them explore their interest in science with exciting experiments.

   Indulging your child’s passions will bring extreme pleasure and joy to your child. They will learn so much as they are keen to participate. Join them and learn from their excitement and joy. Its amazing how passions can become a life habit.

Our world is so much richer and calmer when there is a strong presence of joy in the world. Children are natural ‘joists’. They find joy in the simplest and least complicated aspects of life.

If you decide to join them you will lighten your world and build happy bridges with your child.

   ‘Joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls”

- Mother Theresa

Let’s think about how good holidays are with our families

We are at the tail end of school term holidays and yes we are busy thinking and doing things that get us ready for the new year in the family schedule, not the least of which is school matters. Here I am reminding everyone to savour and still enjoy what is left of the holiday. They are such a gift for a family enabling them to connect in a deeper and special way. It is important to reflect on the good they have done for everyone in the family.

 Consider the following thoughts that feed into our belief of the value of family holidays

• A surprise research finding suggests that blood pressure is reduced when you take that well earnt rest whether it be for a weekend or longer. Also research suggests that heart disease is reduced and depression less likely when vacations are taken. So overall it is about improving your mental and physical health and this flows onto your children.

•     Being on holidays with your child gives you the chance to build life long memories which are so important to the child. Happy memories can be life long.

•     You break from the normal routine and this sets up lots of opportunities to connect in different ways. Sometimes these can be spontaneous and give you a chance to be seen in a completely different light by your children. Suddenly children may discover how funny their father is on holidays.

•     Life at home comes with responsibilities, duties and order. Holidays can be worry free and less stress on completing tasks and doing jobs. It is about finding your family joy.

•     Holidays have built in quantity times with your children. How often during the year do you find longer and more available space to fit in conversations and fun with your children?

•     On holidays especially when the vacation is away from the home you get the opportunity to show and teach your child about nature and life issues. This could be teaching them about sea shells through to environmental matters such as why grass is green. This is a special time to step outside the norm as a parent and to be a real educator of culture and life.

•     By having a regular family holiday you are building a holiday tradition. Children remember well how you as a family operate in such a situation. Photos can become long term cherished memories. For example, in a caravan you may share meals with other families regularly. With a beach holiday you may have a tradition of swimming together, burying each other in sand etc. All rich family traditions of being joyful together. It is all about celebrating the various values that bring us together. We also let go of feeling we must be in control and accountable.

•     We all need stress busters from the busy years we have. We need an unwind time and a time for renewal. Family holidays can achieve so much in reducing stress.

You learn more about your children and they learn more about you through relaxed family holidays Often your children see a new you and enjoy what they see. Also you discover more about your child when you see them happily playing and engaged in more relaxed activities. In this space there is no judgement and lots of enjoyment.

Finally you can develop stronger and happier family bonds on holidays. You actually learn how to operate more effectively as a family unit. Such things as cooperation, better interaction and spontaneous joy come from family vacation.

So, I am wondering, have you planned your next trip?

 ‘The greatest legacy we can leave our children is happy memories.’

                                                                                       -Og Mandino

A few tips to keep the household happy

We all like a happy contented house and we are all aware that it doesn’t take much to turn the balance from a happy household to a cranky one in a short time.

Here are a few practical tips that may have the potential to ease household tension.

Consider:

 keep the house uncluttered as much as possible. Cluttered houses make as all cranky as we feel lost in the maze of items scattered around the house. The areas where the children use the most could be an easy space in which to walk around.

 Try not to over talk your child when you are busy and expect them to do jobs. The question is, will they listen to you and how often do you need to repeat yourself?

 Be proactive. If you can see trouble ahead can you ward it off or change some dynamic to lessen the impact.

 Watch how tired you are getting. Dealing with the bigger issues when you are tired can be disastrous and put things out of perspective.

 Each day think about keeping the happy levels up with children. A house that seems happy is good for mental health. A child feels secure when family around them are in a positive mood.

 At night in preparing children for bed think about dulling the lights a half hour before bedtime. The atmosphere you create calms everyone down and is great preparation for going to bed.

 Do you play music around the house? You can get your child involved in choosing some of this music. Listening to beautiful sounds is such a calming agent for everyone.

 Having plenty of healthy snacks around the house, fruit bowls and healthy snack food that a child can access in the fridge presents a house that is warm and inviting through nurturing food.

 Allow plenty of light in your house. Happy moods and positivity come from light infused environments. Make your home warm and inviting.

 Set up some routines around the house. This could involve setting tables, pulling down blinds, putting dishes away in their correct place etc. Your child will be comforted by routine and familiarity. They need to know how well they are to live in their house.

 Display your child’s work boldly and confidently perhaps on the fridge or a notice board. Let them see that in this house everyone is proud of the children’s efforts.

 Consider your backyard. Is it set up to give your child space to play. Talk to your child about what they would like to see in their backyard.

These simple suggestions are about making life at home easier to manage as a family. We know that the less tension that we encounter in a home setting, the happier the environment which for our children is to be a safe haven.

“A home that is warm and inviting that allows a child to breathe with ease is happy space for any child.”

— Gail J Smith

Parenting through uncertain times

We live in a fast moving world where internet and especially social media impact so much on how we see and interpret the world. I appreciate that for parents finding the right path to direct and support their child over their growing years comes with challenges.

The following thoughts may help to provide a domestic climate where a child feels safe and enabled in such an overstimulated world:

• Communication is a vital key to supporting your children. Encourage open and honest communication with your children about what is happening. Provide age- appropriate information about the situation and answer their questions truthfully. Let them know that it's okay to feel scared or confused. Let them see how you are open to talking about all sorts of matters with no judgement.

• Establishing and maintaining a consistent daily routine can provide children with a sense of stability and predictability during uncertain times. Routine and family rituals are comforting to a child who needs to know their boundaries and limitations.

• Limit children's exposure to news coverage and social media discussions about the uncertain situation. Instead, provide updates and information in a calm and reassuring manner. Read newspapers with information that is appropriate to be read.

• Validate your child's feelings and emotions regularly, acknowledging that it's normal to feel scared, anxious, or uncertain during challenging times. Encourage them to express their feelings through talking, drawing, or writing them. Let them see how you manage your emotions and deal with unsettling situations. Be authentic.

• Help children focus on what they can control in the situation, such as practicing good hygiene, following safety guidelines, and engaging in activities that promote well-being. Empower them to take positive actions within their control. Talk about what is reasonable to be in their control.

• If a child can learn to problem solve they become independent learners. Teach children problem-solving skills and encourage them to brainstorm solutions to the challenges they are facing. Sometimes breaking down problems into smaller parts makes solutions easier to manage.

• Model self-care behaviours for your children by taking care of your own physical and emotional well-being. Let them see that you value personal care to nurture your self interests.

• Help children stay connected with friends and loved ones through virtual means, such as video calls, online games etc. Social connections can provide comfort and support during uncertain times. Remember it takes a village to bring up a child.

• Encourage resilience by highlighting examples of resilience in stories, movies, or real-life experiences. Help children recognize their own strengths and abilities to overcome challenges and bounce back from adversity. Affirm regularly their strengths when you notice them.

• If you notice signs of significant distress, don't hesitate to seek professional help from a counsellor, therapist, or mental health professional who specializes in working with children. Such help is readily available to families.

Let’s be optimistic and positive with our children letting them see that with good care and proper directions today’s world can be understood and managed. As a parent negotiating your own way through today’s world will be a challenge. However, with a little bit of reflection and care you can make such a difference for your child.

“Whilst we live in uncertain times, let’s be certain we value effective parenting
to make the difference for our children.”

— Gail J Smith

The value of being positive around your child

We live in a world where we are constantly addressing mental health as it is such an interfering and common part of our society. Your child learns so much from you and it is amazing how your disposition can help your child see the world in a positive light.

Consider the following:

• When you portray yourself positively as a parent, your child learns a great deal. They like to copy you and see you in a very positive light.

• If you exhibit a positive presence as a parent, your child absorbs significant learning. They will want to imitate it and they will see how much better the world appears from that perspective.

• If you project positivity as a parent, your child picks up on important lessons. This is a great way of teaching optimism.

• If you see the world as a happy place in which to live that will influence their world.

• Being an optimistic around your child invites them to problem solve in an optimistic way rather than focusing on unsolvable problems

• It is a matter of conditioning your child to being positive. It’s a safer place in which to live.

• When your child adopts positivity it attracts people who enjoy life. Don’t forget to use laughter as part of your persona around your child. Laughter is a happy space in which to live.

• By demonstrating a positive disposition your child will be less anxious to approach you over matters that trouble them.

A bright happy parents who savours life is a mindful person who can teach their child to see the world as a hopeful place. What better mental health lesson can you find?

“Keep your eyes on the sun and you will not see the shadows”

— Aboriginal proverb

Build resilience in your child

As parents, from the very beginning, we see ourselves as the primary nurturer. We should also be seeing ourselves as the primary builder of resilience in our children. We want them to be strong, independent people, who can cope in life, without relying too heavily on us the parents. Sometimes, because we become cautious and anxious to ensure that our children are coping well, we forget about our role to strengthen their resilience and give them the skills they need to survive outside of the family cave.

Consider the following:

• Teach children how to identify problems, brainstorm solutions and take action to address challenges.

• Encourage them to think creatively and persistently seek solutions, even when faced with setbacks. Let them see that failure is part of life.

• Help children develop a growth mindset by emphasizing the power of positive thinking and seeing challenges as opportunities for growth. Encourage them to focus on their strengths. See life as an opportunity and stay focused on solving problems not being overcome by them.

• Create a supportive and nurturing environment where children feel comfortable expressing their emotions openly and seeking support when needed. Offer empathy and encouragement. Let them see how possible it is for them to work through a successful process.

• Equip children with effective coping skills to manage stress, such as deep breathing exercises, mindfulness practices, and relaxation techniques. Encourage them to develop healthy outlets for expressing emotions, such as writing in diaries, art, or physical activity.

• Foster independence in children by encouraging them to take on age-appropriate

  responsibilities. Allow them to experience natural consequences and learn from their mistakes in a supportive environment.

• Cultivate strong, supportive relationships with family members, friends, and other trusted adults who can serve as positive role models.. Your child needs all the positive help they can get.

• Expose children to stories of resilience through books, movies, and real-life examples. Highlight individuals who have overcome adversity and achieved success . Talk about them and especially their qualities.

• Focus on effort rather than outcomes and celebrate children's achievements, big and small. Praise their hard work, resilience, and perseverance. Celebrating the process not so much the results of the outcomes.

• Create a sense of belonging within the family and community by involving children in meaningful activities, traditions, and rituals. There are many charitable organizations with which they can engage themselves.

• Be a positive role model for resilience by demonstrating healthy coping strategies, and positive problem-solving skills. Show children that setbacks and failures are opportunities for growth and learning.

• When you are around your child be an optimistic person. Let them see that life is a hopeful experience. Moody environments can breed anxiety.

Be prepared to nurture independence in your child as this will be a major hallmark of strength for your child. Let them slowly engage with the world by themselves as this will gradually build strong resilience leading to a happier individual.

“Encouraging independence and building resilience in your child is a life saver”

— Gail J Smith

Teach mindfulness to your child

Teaching mindfulness is a powerful tool in overcoming the overstimulated world in which our children live. By offering slow and steady activities to your child where they recognize and sensitize to their environment can be nothing short of a helpful tool in coping with stress and the hectic world that children experience with such distractions as social media etc.

The following activities offer some relief from the busy world and teach your child to be sensitive to the moment.

• Take a few moments each day to practise deep breathing exercises with your child. Encourage them to notice the sensation of their breath as it enters and leaves their body, helping them anchor themselves in the present moment. This could be done at times that are built into routine such as before meals, at bedtime, before school etc.

• Engage in a mindful listening exercise with your child. Sit quietly together and listen carefully to various sounds in your environment, such as birds chirping or cars passing by. Discuss what you noticed afterwards, such as the different pitches or rhythms of the sounds. Great fun to do in the backyard, at parks, the beach etc.

• Practise mindful body scans with your child. Lie down together in a comfortable position and guide them through a relaxation exercise, focusing on each part of the body from head to toe. Encourage them to notice any sensations or feelings without judgement.

• Practise loving-kindness meditation with your child. Sit together in a comfortable position and guide them to silently repeat phrases of well-wishes for themselves and others, such as "May I be happy, may you be happy, may all beings be happy."

• Create a mindful art project with your child, such as colouring mandalas or painting rocks. Focus on the process rather than the end result, encouraging open conversation and exploration of thoughts and feelings during the activity. Come back later and talk about what you created and what it meant to you.

• Take a mindful nature walk with your child. Explore your surroundings together, noticing the colours, textures, and smells of the natural world around you. Encourage your child to engage their senses and appreciate the beauty of the outdoors. The local park can do the job as well.

• Cooking can be a mindful experience as you mix food together and reflect on the texture and feel of the ingredients as they morph into a new food. Also follow up with a mindful time of enjoying the various flavours.

• Music is a great vehicle for mindful activities. Lie together on the floor and just

  take in the music. Let the child enjoy their music as well as other music you may introduce.

Mindfulness is all about learning to savour the moment and to appreciate and be sensitive to what is happening around you. In our world of over stimulation, it is wonderful to introduce to our children, the art of slowing down and simply smelling the roses. One they feel the advantage they will adopt the principal themselves. Here you give them a great new life source.

“Wake up to what’s around you and savour the moment with your child.”

— Gail J Smith

Building confidence in your child

From the moment a child is born there will be small signs of seeking independence. Perhaps ever so subtle but none the less there is a definite presence of wanting to be independent. As parents our role is to be the nurturer and provide safety and security for our child. For a parent, letting go of your responsibility can be difficult. Research tells us, that as a child reaches out for more independence, we demonstrate better parenting, if we gently walk with them as they take steps to strengthen their personal growth. There are many reasons why being alongside your child as they take independent steps is a mature way of parenting. Consider:

• Developing independence empowers children to believe in themselves and their abilities. As they accomplish tasks on their own, they gain confidence in their skills and decision-making capabilities. There is nothing like feeling successful when taking a new independent step.

• Independence fosters problem-solving skills. When children face challenges independently, they learn to think critically, adapt to new situations, and find creative solutions. They understand that they must rely on themselves and this does not frighten them.

• Learning to be independent instils a sense of responsibility in children. They understand the consequences of their actions and take ownership of tasks, fostering accountability and self-reliance. They will try different solutions to problems and not be intimidated by an occasional failure.

• Independence allows children to make decisions and choices on their own. Through these experiences, they learn to weigh options, consider consequences, and develop sound decision-making abilities. There is nothing more liberating than making your own decisions.

• Independence encourages self-reliance. Children become more resourceful and resilient as they learn to depend on themselves to accomplish tasks and overcome obstacles. They will ask questions but not expect to be given the answer.

• Developing independence prepares children for adulthood. By learning essential life skills and becoming self-sufficient, they gain the confidence and competence to thrive in the responsibilities of adulthood. Little by little they step into an adult world, well prepared with less surprises.

• Independence contributes to building healthy relationships. Children who are independent are better able to communicate their needs, assert boundaries, and engage in mutually respectful interactions with others. This is all about developing emotional maturity.

• Independence fosters a spirit of exploration and creativity. When children have the freedom to pursue their interests and ideas independently, they are more likely to discover new passions and talents. They become better risk takers and enjoy the challenge.

• Developing independence helps children form their own identity. As they make choices and pursue interests that align with their values and preferences, they gain a clearer sense of who they are and what they stand for. A child with such confidence will attract like minded children. This makes for forming healthy relationships.

In my experience as school principal, it was always the case that children who were given opportunities to demonstrate independence appeared happy and self assured. They engaged with all sorts of peers and were comfortable in many settings.

“Building independence in your child is all about sound parenting.”

— Gail J Smith

The Magic of Creative Thinking

Encouraging your child to be creative is such a critical part of their development. Remember, being creative is not about being right or wrong. It is also not about failure. It is all about the ability to express oneself in an open uncompromised way. Encouraging your child to be creative can be in many forms. It can be through art, plays, drama, music etc. It is all about the child expressing themselves and feeling satisfied that they find ways to do just that, be expressive!

• Encouraging your child's creativity is like unlocking a magical door to their imagination. It lets them explore new worlds of ideas, making everyday life more enchanting and filled with possibilities. Be open to all their ideas and place no judgement on their efforts.

• Creative activities are like giving your child a pair of confidence wings. As they let their creativity soar, they discover their own abilities and gain the self-assurance to take on new challenges. They become real risk takers.

• Creativity is an exciting adventure in the land of problem-solving. It's like giving your child a treasure map to navigate challenges, encouraging them to discover clever solutions with a spirit of curiosity. It also takes away the fear of failure.

• Creativity is like having a playground for the imagination. It lets your child swing from the heights of their dreams, slide into new possibilities, and build castles of ideas in the ever-expansive world of their own imagination.

• Creative activities offer your child an expressive color palette for their emotions. It's like painting a canvas with feelings, allowing them to express the vibrant hues of joy, the deep shades of introspection, and the bright tones of excitement.

• Fostering creativity is like packing a picnic basket of innovation for your child's future. It equips them with a delightful array of inventive snacks, ensuring they're ready to feast on fresh ideas and contribute uniquely to the ever-evolving feast of life.

“The power of imagination will be a driving force for your child’s creative process”

— Gail Smith

Help your child have a great start to the school year

It is different experience for every child and of course the child's order in the family will impact on how a child adjusts to school. Every child though will experience some anxiety mixed with excitement as they begin a new year. As a parent, there are some actions you can take to ease the pressure for your child and let them know that you are sharing this time together. Connect well and early in the year with the school.

Routine is important

Set a consistent daily routine that includes a regular wake-up time, meal schedule, and bedtime. Routines provide stability and help children feel more secure as they start school. Children need their boundaries and rituals.

Keep the conversation going

Foster open communication with your child. Ask about their day, listen actively and be supportive. This helps them feel comfortable sharing their experiences and concerns. Try not to probe with too many questions.

Set up a homework space for your child

Designate a quiet and organized space for homework. Having a dedicated area fosters concentration and helps your child establish good study habits. Get them involved in choosing and setting up this space.

Start giving them independent tasks

Encourage your child to take on age-appropriate responsibilities. This builds a sense of independence and helps them develop essential life skills. School will be teaching about being independent learners.

Keep the balance at home

Emphasize the importance of a healthy lifestyle. Ensure your child gets enough sleep, eats nutritious meals, and stays active. A healthy body supports a healthy mind. Perhaps they can help create their own nutritious lunch box.

Connect well and early in the year with the school

Establish a positive relationship with your child's teachers. Attend parent-teacher meetings, stay informed about school activities, and collaborate with educators to support your child's learning. Simply be in touch regularly.

Celebrate special moments along the way

Celebrate both big and small achievements. Positive reinforcement encourages your child's efforts and boosts their confidence as they navigate the challenges of school.

Build social stamina in your child

Encourage your child to make new friends and be kind to others. Developing social skills is an essential aspect of their overall growth and well-being.

Learning to be adaptable

Acknowledge that starting school may bring changes and challenges. Be patient, offer reassurance, and help your child adapt to the new environment. Talk about how change can be a positive thing.

Being involved helps your child adapt to school

Stay involved in your child's education. Attend school events, volunteer when possible, and stay informed about their progress. Your active involvement reinforces the importance of education in their life. Children learn with a lot more enthusiasm when they know you value education.

Never underestimate the difference you make to a child’s settling into school. Your reassurance and presence gives them a feeling of being safe and not dealing with the adjustment on their own. They grow stronger from your encouragement and presence.

“The beautiful thing about learning is that no one can take it away from you.”

— B B King

Finding balance between structured activities and long summer holidays

The school holidays can seem long at times and there will be moments of boredom where the children are struggling to find activities to do. Consider mixing a few enjoyable structured activities with those long summer days.

Here are some ideas to get you thinking:

Creative Workshops or Classes: Enrol your child in a creative workshop or class, such as art, music, or coding. These structured activities allow them to explore new skills in a fun and educational environment. They also get to meet new friends.

Summer Reading Program: Implement a summer reading program with specific goals and rewards. Set aside dedicated time each day for reading, and make it an enjoyable experience by discussing the stories together. Have lots of books lying around the house.

Nature Explorations and Scavenger Hunts: Plan structured nature outings or scavenger hunts to explore the outdoors. This provides a blend of structure and adventure, allowing children to learn about nature in a hands-on way.

Cooking or Baking: This is always a winner with children and so therapeutic for everyone.

Gardening Project: Start a small gardening project with your child. It could involve planting and caring for flowers, herbs, or vegetables. This structured activity teaches responsibility and introduces kids to the wonders of nature. It’s fun planting and fun watering.

Weekly Family Movie Nights with Discussions: Designate a specific night each week for a family movie night. Choose movies that are not only entertaining but also have meaningful themes. After the movie, engage in discussions with your child, encouraging them to share their thoughts and insights.

Structured Games: Have a game night where you play scrabble, monopoly or twister. Just make it a fun night with popcorn.

As we approach the latter bracket of school holiday it is a great idea to bring the troupes in to work together as the year ahead will be a busy one.

“Cause a little bit of Summer is what the whole year is about.”

— John Mayer

New year’s resolutions that are fun and enjoyable to do with your child

Who really sets new years goals and sticks to them? Certainly the idea of reflecting on change and general improvement is a great idea and we all look forward to new experiences that lighten our load and improve relationships. Here are some fun suggestions that may get you thinking about new ways to engage with your growing child throughout the year we have just commenced.

Consider:

Daily Dose of Laughter: Resolve to bring more laughter into each day, whether it's through silly jokes, funny stories, or playful activities that create joyous moments.

Tech-Free Family Time: Commit to designated tech-free hours where the focus is on quality family time —playing games, having conversations, or enjoying outdoor activities without electronic distractions.

Adventure Jar: Create an adventure jar filled with fun and spontaneous family activities. Each week, pick a new adventure from the jar to keep things exciting and create lasting memories.

Parent-Child Date Nights: Schedule regular one-on-one date nights with each child, allowing for individualized attention and opportunities to bond over shared activities or outings.

Random Acts of Kindness Together: Make a resolution to perform random acts of kindness as a family, spreading positivist and reinforcing the importance of compassion and generosity.

Storytelling Extravaganza: Start a storytelling tradition where each family member takes turns creating and sharing imaginative stories. This fosters creativity and strengthens the family narrative.

Secret Family Handshake: Develop a secret family handshake or high-five that's unique to your clan, adding an element of fun and connection to daily interactions.

Family Photo Challenges: Create monthly photo challenges where each family member contributes pictures based on a theme, promoting creativity and providing a visual chronicle of the year.

Gratitude Jar Ritual: Start a gratitude jar where everyone can drop notes expressing gratitude for each other. Read the notes together on special occasions for a heartwarming family ritual.

DIY Art Gallery: Transform a wall or designated space into a DIY art gallery where everyone's artistic creations are proudly displayed. It's a fun way to appreciate each other's unique talents and expressions.

Nature Explorer Weekends: Plan weekends dedicated to exploring nature together. Whether it's hiking, picnicking, or bird-watching, these outdoor adventures provide opportunities for shared discoveries and relaxation.

Each new year will bring challenges, excitement and new experiences into the family. By adding a little extra enjoyment and family gathering time in some form you lighten the heavy load of parenting and continue to strengthen lasting bonds with your child. It's amazing how a little bit of extra joy can enrich the family.

“When we set goals we believe in ongoing improvement. That’s got to make things a little better.”

— Gail J Smith

Prepare well for the new year

Here are some ideas to start us thinking about creative ways to introduce our children to 2024. With each new year comes opportunities to change, shift thinking, grow in different directions, challenge current ideas etc. Perhaps some suggestions may set you in a new direction as you prepare for what’s ahead.

Family Vision Board Party: Set up a family vision board to set intentions and aspirations for the year ahead. Gather magazines, art supplies, and create vision boards together, depicting hopes, dreams, and goals for each family member.

New Year's Eve Time Capsule: Create a time capsule filled with small mementos, notes, or drawings representing memorable moments from the past year. Seal it and set a date to open it together next year to reminisce and see how much has changed. Place it in a safe and memorable place easy to access.

Setting Family Resolutions: Discuss and set family resolutions together. Encourage everyone to share one goal or resolution they'd like to achieve throughout the year. It's a fun way to support each other's aspirations.

Reflective Family Dinner: Host a reflective family dinner where everyone shares their favourite memories from the past year. Make it festive by dressing up, cooking a special meal, and enjoying quality time together. Keep it upbeat and the memories positive.

Gratitude Jar for the New Year: Start a gratitude jar specifically for the new year. Each day, encourage family members to write down something they're grateful for and place it in the jar. By the end of the year, read and reflect on the abundance of blessings collected.

Family Meeting and Planning: Hold a family meeting to discuss plans and activities for the upcoming year. Brainstorm ideas for vacations, outings, or special family events, allowing everyone to contribute to the planning process.

Family diary: Set up a calendar for the new year. Make it very visible and invite family to start writing up events that they know about. Make it a discussion piece so that the family can discuss whether there are too many busy events etc.

House remodeling: Is there any changes you need to make in the home to improve conditions for your growing family? Perhaps discuss where study areas are allocated and how entertainment areas will work for the year. Think about how you can improve movement and circulation around the house for all the family.

The New Year should be a time where we start to reflect on our hopes and aspirations for the new year. We all seek to keep growing and improving. We recognize that our children are changing and we take that into consideration as we reflect on our needs and expectations for the forthcoming months.

“Each year we begin again. A chance to refresh ourselves on so many levels.”

— Gail Smith

Encourage creativity in our children

Einstein once said: Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world.

All great learners were creative. They experimented with ideas, challenged their thoughts, looked outside the square and developed a vision of what they wanted to achieve. As a parent you can find many ways to develop your child’s creativity and of course encourage them to follow their passions. The thoughts below are a guide to reflecting on how creativity can be a major driving force of learning for your child.

Creativity encourages Inquisitiveness and Exploration
Creativity sparks curiosity, prompting children to explore and question the world around them. Let them ask those important questions.

A child encouraged to ask "What if?" might explore science experiments, leading to a lifelong interest in discovery and learning. There is no room for self doubt with creativity.

Creativity develops Critical Thinking and Problem-Solving Skills
Creative activities challenge children to think critically and solve problems, essential skills for effective learning.

Building with blocks or solving a puzzle encourages creative problem-solving, laying the foundation for analytical thinking. Play games with your child and encourage different types of formal learning such as chess, dominoes etc.

Creativity fosters a Love for Learning
Creative pursuits make learning enjoyable, fostering a love for discovering new things. This is all about following those passions that drive your interest

Engaging in imaginative storytelling or creative writing can make literature and language exciting, creating a positive association with learning. Encourage your child with reading.

Creativity enhances Communication and Expression
Creative activities provide children with various avenues to express themselves, improving communication skills. Think about how wonderful drama is to enrich the spirit.

Drawing, painting, or even acting out stories allows children to convey their thoughts and feelings, enhancing their ability to communicate effectively. Allow your child to sing, dance, recite invent plays etc. It is all about being creative.

Creativity promotes Adaptability and Resilience

Creativity encourages adaptability and resilience by teaching children to approach challenges with an open mind. They should not be afraid of failure but see it as an opportunity to rethink.

When faced with a setback, a child accustomed to creative problem-solving might see it as an opportunity to try a different approach. In fact they enjoy the challenge looking at alternative ways of thinking..

If our children are encouraged to explore and to see the world through creative eyes, they will be creators, innovators, leaders etc. Creativity gives you the confidence to think freely and to take risks in learning that can lead you into new directions. Be the parent that invites creativity into the life of your child. They will be happier and richer for the experience.

‘Creativity is intelligence having fun’

-Albert Einstein

Christmas Home Decorations - Rituals And Happy Memories

There is magic in Christmas for all children. Fantasy, dreams and excitement mount. The build up brings incredible joy and imaginations run rife. When the family decorates the tree and house in bright lights and colours, the home environment takes on a special magic for your child. Here are some thoughts about how your efforts in decorating for Christmas has so much long term value for your child.

Creativity and expression at Christmas time
Engaging in Christmas decorations encourages creativity and self-expression among children. They get to choose colours, designs, and arrangements, fostering their imaginative skills and allowing them to express themselves freely through decoration choices. This creative outlet can be a therapeutic way to channel emotions and thoughts positively. They will not forget the ritual of setting up the Christmas tree

Bonding and Togetherness
Decorating as a family cultivates a sense of togetherness and strengthens family bonds. Working together towards a shared goal, discussing decoration ideas, and collaborating on various aspects of decoration builds a sense of unity, fostering positive relationships. Memories are created from doing such fun family activities. The more involved they are the better.

Joy and Positive Emotions
The process of decorating for Christmas brings joy and excitement. The anticipation of the holiday season, the colourful lights, and cheerful decorations contribute to a positive atmosphere that can uplift spirits, reduce stress, and evoke feelings of happiness and contentment. It's all a positive time to feel good.

A Sense of Tradition and Belonging
Engaging in Christmas decorating traditions instils a sense of belonging and connection to something larger than oneself. Participating in these rituals and customs, passed down through generations, gives children a sense of identity, continuity, and stability, contributing to their emotional well-being. Never underestimate the importance of routine.

Mindfulness and appreciation
Decorating with the spirit of Christmas encourages mindfulness and appreciation for the present moment. Children learn to appreciate the beauty in small things, focusing on the joy of the activity and the happiness it brings rather than the material aspects.

Christmas can mean many things to different people. Above all it is about coming together and celebrating in some form. It is recognised as a reflective time for families and it can have an amazing calming and mentally stabilising effect for children. It is way of putting closure on the year and bringing together in a warm, comforting way all the feelings, emotions, experiences, joys and maybe sorrows that have been experienced and shared over the year.

Merry Christmas to all families in all shapes and forms.