Teach our children to be courteous
There is a silent, steady power present in being courteous. You are stronger by nature of your courteous style. By treating someone with dignity no matter how different your thoughts are, there is little with which to argue. After all, they see how you accept them as legitimate. You accept their right to have a voice, which gives you a voice.
The value you have to your child
We appreciate that we are important and that we hold great responsibility and balance of power in taking care of our child. I wonder how often we think about the value we give to our child.
Dr Seuss said “To the world you may be one person; but to one person you may be the world.”
Are you planning everything around your children?
Downtime with the family is a vital time to replenish the family spirit, refresh relationships and simply enjoy each other’s company.
Being a mum - something to think about
I have learnt some precious realities in watching mums raise a family, live with it and through it, suffer all the hardships, carry the weak moments and rise above the troubled spots. Now that’s being a mum!
What will your child remember about you?
What do our children really think about us? Are they aware of all our efforts? Do they remember the little details and the extra efforts we make over the years? What is their level of appreciation of us the parents?
The delight and significance of reading to your child.
There are significant advantages of reading to your children, in addition to the special family time.
Give your child occasions to make choices
Children need occasions to make choices and grow to understand that in making choices we live with the consequences. Decision making can be taught as much as learnt on the run. For our children, teaching them that making their own decisions comes with the joy of owning the outcome and also learning from the outcome.
Let’s teach our children to enjoy what they have and not seek out more
No easy task for parents who want to teach their children how to enjoy what they have rather than seeking out the next improved item. Read here for some examples of how to teach children to value what they have.
A laugh a day can keep the blues at bay.
In all my time as a teacher and Principal, I always felt that classrooms filled with humour were happier and more enlivened spaces in which children could work and learn. ‘ Always find a reason to laugh. It may not add years to your life but will surely add life to your years.’ Anon.
Managing children’s behaviour.
The household should have clear rules and be a place where the child can see you, the parent, living by the standards you set for them. Here are some tips to help manage children’s behaviour at home.
Choose your battles
Here are a few thoughts on why choosing your battles is important in maintaining a strong and happy relationship with your child:
Keeping track of the media for children
There is so much news at the moment about the distressing situation in Ukraine, the ongoing battle with Covid and other local issues. The recent floods were very disturbing in Australia. It doesn’t take long for children to pick up that there is much anxiety and stress in our world.
The importance of getting support when needed
As parents, we simply don’t have all the answers. Just when we think we are on top of matters, our child surprises us with new challenges. It is mentally healthy to recognise that seeking help is an excellent response when needed.
Differences in families
‘It is not our differences that divide us. It is our inability to recognise, accept and celebrate those differences.’ -Audre Lorde
There is much to be learnt when a child starts school. Their emotional and social growth is all the richer for embracing the wonderfully rich tapestry of different families across the years.
When home life changes
Family situations change through separation and divorce and children will feel this. The key point is to provide ongoing love, understanding, reassurance and stability in difficult times. Try to remember that whilst you are going through a personal crisis, there is no avoiding that your child will be experiencing emotionally charged times. Accept that you will need support and so to your child. Rely on family support and networks that will minimise some of the impacts.
Catching good behaviour isn’t that difficult
How often do we reward our children in spontaneous ways? Do we notice the various spontaneous occasions that can be rewarded and often through different ways?
Never underestimate the value of the positive words you use with your children. There is a clever way of getting even smarter with words and that is by picking up on spontaneous positive moments you notice.
Respect the difference each child brings to the family
Each child brings something different to the family. Each child is an individual and should be parented as an individual. Here are some thoughts on the matter from Gail Smith, The Primary Years.
Consider avoiding confrontation where possible.
As children grow older, you may find it better to avoid confrontations and find different ways to amend the situation. This is easier said than done sometimes. Here is some advice from Gail Smith, The Primary Years.
Who has rights in the family?
Everybody has rights in a family. No one is excluded from having rights, no matter what age or disposition. When we reflect more deeply on this, it can help us put things into perspective. Often, we can be overwhelmed by our role as parents and unsure about our rights in that role. We can sometimes wonder about the vulnerability of our children and what part we play in making them secure.
How to deal with giving consequences for problem behaviour
I totally dislike the word Punishment. It has such dark and serious connotations and for a child it can be quite overwhelming when they hear there will be punishment for bad actions. How about saying there will be some consequences for poor behaviour. Here are some important aspects of dealing with problem behaviour that should be understood when managing negative behaviour with children.