Have you ever heard of the imposter syndrome?

It can creep up on you quickly and before you know it you are a victim of it. It’s that nagging feeling that of course you are not good enough and people will find out about you soon enough. It makes you feel vulnerable and not worthy. It is quite a nasty

Imposter syndrome can indeed be damaging, but parents can play a crucial role in helping their children recognize and cope with it.

Here are six ideas with examples for parents to teach their children about imposter syndrome:

1. Promote Self-Awareness:

   Example: Ask your child about their feelings and experiences. Say, "Have you ever felt like you didn't belong or that you weren't good enough? It's okay to feel that way sometimes, and we can talk about it. Those feelings will trick you easily into believing you are just not good enough.”

2. Normalize Imperfection:

   Example: Share your own experiences of self-doubt and how you overcame them. Say, "Even grown-ups sometimes feel like they don't know what they're doing, but we learn and improve as we go along." Talk about the time you had self-doubt and how you worked it through. What clever strategies did you use?

3. Highlight Effort and Growth:

   Example: Praise your child for their hard work and efforts rather than just their achievements. Say, "I'm proud of how you worked on this project, even if the outcome wasn't perfect. You're learning and growing, and that's what matters." Talk about how the effort and the journey was a success in its own right.

4. Encourage Self-Compassion:

   Example: Teach your child to be kind to themselves. Say, "It's okay to make mistakes. Treat yourself with the same kindness you would offer a friend when they make a mistake." Talk about how mistakes are part of the growth process and we all make them.

5. Set Realistic Expectations:

   Example: Help your child set achievable goals and expectations. Say, "Let's set goals that challenge you but are still doable. That way, you'll feel more confident in reaching them." Be realistic about what is possible and celebrate as goals are reached.

6. Focus on Strengths and Talents:

   Example: Encourage your child to recognise their strengths and talents. Say, "You have unique qualities that make you special. Let's talk about the things you're really good at and proud of." Focus on their personal strengths. The things that make them unique. Highlight how they make a difference.

By addressing imposter syndrome with these strategies and examples, parents can empower their children to develop a healthy self-image, embrace challenges, and build resilience in the face of self-doubt which can be particularly overpowered during adolescence.

 ‘Self-doubt can be destructive for our children. Keep massaging their sense of self-worth and reminding them how society is richer for having them.'

                                                                                       -Gail J Smith

Careful about jumping to conclusions

How often do we immediately have an answer for something? Sometimes when we hear news that can be unsettling, we can spontaneously jump to conclusions. Often this can lead us straight to the negative, and we skip the whole idea of looking at the issue rationally and logically. We all tend to do this from time to time. I believe it is part of our mental defence against getting hurt in any way.

When we do this in front of our children, we teach them that a quick reaction is the best and most likely accurate response.

Consider:

• When we feel like jumping to conclusions, a good response is simply to slow down, take a breath and reflect before saying too much. Remember what we say are powerful messages to our children.

• Sometimes your child might hear about something happening at school and immediately jump to a negative conclusion for them. This is a great opportunity to teach them to stop, take a breath and talk about the issue. After a discussion, the issue often does not seem so bad and rational conversation can happen.

• Consider just learning to stop and think before jumping to a conclusion. It is all about training yourself to slow down and reflect. Initial silence, rather than a quick response, allows you time to think it through more carefully. Your child will get to know that this is how you respond to news. You carefully process it and then talk about it.

• When you jump to conclusions, it can often lead to wrong assumptions that require you to reverse your thinking. However, in the interim, you have made statements that may have been better left unsaid. Using the skill of stopping and thinking first, shows your child that being cautious before interpreting something is the best and least harmful way to go.

• Jumping to conclusions is all about feeling that the worst is about to happen. This is anxiety, and we need to train ourselves to stop thinking the worst all the time. Our children need to see that the worst is not always the case, and through simple reflection, we can rationalise things better.

Finally, keep the knee-jerk reactions to a minimum. Train yourself to feel calmer and, above all show your child that all is not negative when you take a good hard look at it. The world is still a beautiful place.

          ‘Snap judgements often lead to regrets for those whose only exercise is jumping to conclusions.’

                                                                               Recite... Piccsy .com

Helping your child develop strong emotional intelligence

We all talk about the avenues to build intellectual intelligence. We also need to recognise that the growth of emotional intelligence is critical for a person to cope well in society and to feel inclusive. Strong emotional intelligence helps us regulate our emotions and view the world in a broader way. Our well-being is best enhanced by developing high levels of emotional intelligence.

There are various simple ways we can help build emotional intelligence in our children. Here are some suggestions:

1. Talk About Feelings:

   Ask your child how they're feeling and why. Encourage them to express their emotions, like happiness, sadness, or anger. Use those words in conversations about how they are feeling. Talking about feelings is seen as a positive sign of building and understanding well-being. Let them see that you have feelings and can manage those feelings. We all have strengths and weaknesses.

2. Listen Actively:

   When your child talks about their feelings, listen carefully without interrupting. Show that you understand and care about what they're saying. Place no judgement on their feelings or emotional state. They will regulate themselves better if you are calm and steady.

3. Teach Problem-Solving:

   Help your child find solutions when they face problems or conflicts. Ask questions like, "What can we do to make this better?" Be prepared to use negotiation with your child.

4. Manage Your Own Emotions:

   Show your child how you handle your own feelings. If you're upset, explain why and how you're trying to feel better. Be authentic when you talk about your feelings and talk about the strategies you will employ to help you through the problem.

5. Empathy and Understanding:

   Teach your child to think about how others might feel. When they see someone sad, ask, "How do you think they're feeling?" Demonstrate empathy in your own life and apply it to the family. If a child sees you empathetic they learn it quickly. Your modelling is so important here.

6. Use Books and Stories:

   Read books or tell stories that explore emotions and situations. Discuss the characters' feelings and ask your child how they would react. Watch movies together that highlight empathy and sympathy. Talk about them as a family

In simple terms, parents can help their children develop emotional intelligence by talking about feelings, listening, problem-solving, setting a good example with their own emotions, teaching empathy, and using stories to explore emotions together. Each day there will be occasions where you can highlight in little ways the importance of being emotionally switched on to life matters.

Be a parent who embraces healthy emotions and recognises the occasions where you can be helpful in strengthening emotional intelligence.

‘One can be the master of what one does, but never of what one feels.”

                                                                            -Gustav Flaubert

Teach children about materialism

Teaching children about materialism is so important as the messages they receive on social media can be overwhelming and intimidating. Also, children need to recognise what materialism actually is and how it doesn't serve us well.

Here are tangible suggestions to teach your child to manage materialism in their life:

Value Experiences Over Things: Teach your child that memories and experiences are more important than stuff. Say, ‘Instead of buying lots of toys, let's go to the park and make fun memories together.’ Being active and engaging with others through sport etc. are very self-satisfying and take the mind off material gain.

Share with Others: Encourage sharing and giving to those in need. Explain, ‘When we have extra, we can give toys or clothes to children who don't have as much.’ Visit the op shops and get your child to gather their old toys to give away. Let them talk to op shop members about how donations work.

Gratitude for What You Have: Express gratitude for the things you already have. Say, ‘Let's take a moment to be thankful for our home, our food, and the toys we have.’ Being grateful reminds your child that what you have is amazing in its own right. This helps not to redirect the thinking that more will make you happy.

Avoid Impulse Buying: Teach your child to think before buying something new. Say, ‘Let's think if we really need this or if it's something we'll use a lot.’ Talk about its value and potential use. Don’t buy it straight away. Let time elapse so that the immediate desire for the goods reduces.

Quality Over Quantity: Emphasise the importance of quality items that last longer.  Talk about how much stronger and more valuable they are in the long run. Teach them about value for money.

Set Limits: Help your child understand limits on buying things. Say, ‘We have a budget, so we can't buy everything we want. Let's choose what's most important.’ Talking about budgets and discussing products and costs raises their awareness of what is expensive.

Keep Busy: Keep your child active and busy. Involvement in sports, outdoor life and various activities is a wonderful and healthy distraction from wanting extra material goods to satisfy their needs. Keep them happily stimulated by life experiences and engagement with others.

These simple messages and examples can help children develop a more balanced and mindful approach to material possessions, fostering gratitude and a healthier perspective on consumerism.

Demonstrate how you maintain and control the urge to buy more on occasion. What satisfies you will be a question on the mind of your child.

‘Too much materialism only clouds a child’s capacity to see life.’

 Gail J Smith

Six mini moments of joy and care to your child

Here are some ideas for giving mini moments of support and encouragement to your child. It is amazing how little encouragement along the way can make all the difference for your child. It doesn’t have to be long and protracted. It just needs to be spontaneous and joyful where the child feels happy, reassured and valued.

1. Getting Closer: Hugging and comforting your child help you become closer, like best friends. It makes them feel safe and close to you.

2. Understanding Feelings: When your child is sad or mad, talking to them and comforting them helps them understand and deal with their feelings better.

3. Feeling Awesome: Saying nice things about what your child does, even if it's a small thing, makes them feel great about themselves. It’s all about positive talk.

4. Being Kind: When you show kindness to your child, like helping them when they're hurt or upset, they learn to be kind to others too. This develops empathy and sympathy.

5. Growing Healthy: Giving your child healthy food, playing with them, and helping them learn new things helps them grow strong and smart.

6. Happy Memories: Doing fun things with your child, like reading stories, baking cookies, or playing games, creates happy memories that they'll remember when they're older. Best to make wonderful long-term memories that will be recounted in their adulthood.

In simple terms, being a good parent means showing love, being there, and doing fun things with your child every day. These little moments of care add up to help your child feel loved while growing up happy and strong. Make it a habit to find occasions to provide those mini moments of care. They will soon add up to a wealth of encouragement.

‘Building blocks of life can start with mini moments of giving joy to your child.’

                                          -Gail J Smith

Being authentic and honest with your child is the best way forward

Being honest and authentic with your children is crucial for building trust, fostering healthy relationships, and promoting their emotional and moral development.

Here are six sound reasons, along with examples of what honesty and authenticity look like in parenting:

1. Building Trust: When you are honest and authentic, your children learn that they can trust you. This trust forms the foundation of a strong parent-child relationship. For example, if your child asks where babies come from, you can provide age-appropriate, honest information instead of making up a story. Tell the truth. Consider of course that it is age-appropriate conversations.

2. Setting a Positive Example: Children often model their behaviour after their parents. They look to you for learning about life. When you demonstrate honesty and authenticity, you set a positive example for them to follow. For instance, if you make a mistake, acknowledge it, apologise, and explain how you plan to make amends. This teaches your child the importance of taking responsibility for their actions. Let them see how you deal with mistakes and accept them as a learning process.

3. Enhancing Communication: Being authentic in your communication encourages open and honest conversations with your children. For instance, if you're going through a challenging time, sharing your feelings and concerns can help your child understand and empathise with your situation. This, in turn, can encourage them to confide in you when they face difficulties and eases the feeling that they will be judged.

4. Fostering Emotional Intelligence: Honesty and authenticity help children develop emotional intelligence. When you express your own emotions honestly and explain how you manage them, your child learns valuable emotional regulation skills. For example, if you're feeling stressed, you can explain that stress is a normal emotion and share healthy coping strategies you use. Letting them see that you are stressed is an acceptable behaviour.

5. Teaching Values and Morality: Authenticity in parenting allows you to impart your values and morals consistently. For example, if you believe in kindness and empathy, you can demonstrate these values in your interactions with others and explain why they are important to you. This helps your child understand the principles that guide your family. Involve them in the way you demonstrate your values. For example, if you are involved in a fundraiser get them involved.

6. Resolving Conflicts: Authenticity is essential when addressing conflicts or disagreements within the family. Instead of avoiding difficult conversations, address them honestly and constructively. For example, if there's a disagreement between siblings, you can facilitate a conversation where each child has the opportunity to express their feelings and thoughts while maintaining a respectful and open atmosphere. If you feel conflictual with your child, sit down together and discuss the issue.

Being authentic becomes easier over time. Here you are not setting up situations that are not sustainable. Your child will come to expect and in fact, demand an authentic relationship. This brings you into a close and intimate relationship with your child.

Being authentic around your child gives them a model of how life works.

Gail Smith

Celebrate your efforts as the first educators of your child

As a parent doing their best, take a bow. You are the first and primary educators of your child and all your efforts will not go unnoticed by your child. The years of effort and the untiring work you put into the rearing of your child will come to fruition as they mature. Of course, the world is not a perfect place and all that should be asked of any parent is that you simply do your best. There will be influences along the way that will impact on your child-rearing work but being consistent and determined with your heart in the right place will win out on this occasion.

Let’s now reflect on how you impact your child as the first and primary educator. The following reasons show you why you make all the difference.

Foundation of Values and Morals: Parents instil their values, ethics, and morals in their children from an early age. It naturally happens that way. This foundation helps shape the child's character and guides them in making ethical decisions throughout their life. They are listening and learning from an early age.

Language and Communication Skills: Parents are the primary source of language development for children. They help children build their vocabulary, improve communication skills, and foster a love for reading and learning. Speak to them well and listen well to what they have to say. How you use your language skills will influence how they use their language skills to others.

Emotional Well-Being: Parents provide emotional support, love, and care that create a secure attachment in children. This secure attachment serves as a strong emotional foundation, promoting positive mental health and resilience. Your emotional support perhaps I should say, this emotional security is the foundation of building self-esteem.

Cultural and Religious Identity: Parents often pass down cultural and religious traditions, customs, and beliefs. This helps children understand their heritage and cultural identity, promoting a sense of belonging. All that you do which is ritual and contains family values will give your child stability and a connection to the past.

Early Learning and Curiosity: Parents stimulate a child's curiosity by answering questions, engaging in activities, and encouraging exploration. This early exposure to learning fosters a lifelong love for knowledge and learning. Being an active, engaging parent will provide the stimulus and interest in learning.

Responsibility and Work Ethic: Parents teach children about responsibility, work ethic, and the importance of setting and achieving goals. These lessons help children develop a strong sense of personal responsibility and motivation. Your modelling in this area happens on a daily basis. They observe how you live and how you live up to your expectations.

In essence, parents play a crucial role in shaping their child's values, identity, emotional well-being, and learning experiences. Being the first educators, they have a profound impact on their children's development, helping them become well-rounded individuals who are prepared to navigate the world with confidence and integrity. The ball is in your court. Enjoy the game.

‘Parents are teachers, and home is a child’s first and most important classroom.’

-Hillary Clinton

Be excited for your child as they attend school each day

Imagine educating your child on your own! There is so much excitement and anticipation when your child starts school as they will be exposed to myriads of opportunities and challenges. You will journey through the school experience and together with your child enjoy the long and winding process together. You are in partnership with the school which sees you as a critical educator and contributor to your child’s education.

A school’s environment will have much to offer your child. Below are some very realistic outcomes that you can expect from the school.

Social Development: School is a place where children interact with peers and learn valuable social skills like sharing, cooperation, and making friends. Parents can be happy about their child's chance to develop important social relationships. Their ability to make friends, keep them and practice the art of good communication comes from the school setting. Such an environment enlivens your child’s emotional and social growth. They learn a lot about self-esteem by studying their peers.

Independence and Responsibility: School teaches children to become more independent and responsible for their actions. Parents can look forward to seeing their child grow in maturity and self-sufficiency as they take on new responsibilities. A school will support the work you do in teaching your child all about being responsible. Teachers work hard to encourage independence in learning and set expectations and goals for your child.

Broadening Horizons: School exposes children to a wide range of subjects, ideas, and experiences that they may not encounter at home. Parents can be excited about the opportunity for their child to explore different interests and broaden their horizons. You cannot do everything. A school presents topics that can be discussed openly and challenges your child to think differently. The setting of a school sets the scene for healthy, vibrant conversation. It encourages your child to think differently.

Emotional and Cognitive Development: School not only focuses on academic learning but also on emotional and cognitive development. Parents can be happy knowing that their child will receive guidance and support in developing important life skills and emotional intelligence. As your child grows, the school will set social and emotional expectations to match their age and learning. It will challenge your child in different ways to enrich their emotional intelligence.

Future Opportunities: A good education lays the foundation for future opportunities and success. Parents can feel excited about the doors that may open for their child as they progress through their educational journey. Who knows what your child will do and become after they leave school? The excitement is to watch how school broadens their thinking and expectations. You are not alone in preparing them for life.

In summary, school offers children a host of benefits, from educational and social growth to independence and future opportunities, which can make parents excited and happy about their child's educational journey. So be happy when you send them off to school. Understand that school will be a setting to parallel all the good work that you do through parenting.

“Tell me and I forget, teach me and I may remember, involve me and I learn.’’                                                                                             

Einstein.

Your child needs your patience as they progress through school

Patience is a vital virtue for parents with children in school because:

Learning Takes Time: Learning is a gradual process, and children need time to absorb new information and develop their skills. Being patient allows them the necessary space to learn at their own pace. Nothing happens overnight and consider that your child will developmentally keep evolving and growing in their own time.

Individual Progress Varies: Every child has a unique learning style and pace. Patience is essential to recognise and respect these individual differences without imposing unrealistic expectations. Allow your child their right to pace their learning, this gives them time to process and to observe and learn what is happening around them. There are no rewards for speed. Remember the story of the turtle and the hare.

Mistakes Are Part of Learning: Children often make mistakes as they learn. This is a natural part of learning. Patience enables parents to offer support and guidance rather than react negatively to errors, fostering a more positive learning environment. Being patient allows your child their right to grow at their own pace.

Building Resilience: Patience helps children build resilience and develop a growth mindset. When they face challenges, patient parents can encourage perseverance and a willingness to learn from setbacks. Resilient people are not quick to be anxious and develop a maturity around them that allows time and space to heal and recover.

Effective Communication: Patient parents are better at listening and understanding their children's concerns and questions about school. This open communication fosters a stronger parent-child relationship and a more supportive educational experience. If you listen well you need to take time and be prepared that there is no timeline for listening effectively.

Modelling Behaviour: Parents who demonstrate patience serve as very effective role models for their children. When children see their parents remaining patient in the face of difficulties, they are more likely to adopt this valuable trait themselves, which can benefit their academic and personal lives. A child will comfortably approach a parent who will be calm, present and patient. That is such an inviting way to present your case when nervous.

Finally, patience can and should be acquired by everyone. It sets the scene for healthy relationships with your child. No one can resist a patient person. There is no need to feel that your child should be at a level of development that is expected of them. Who sets those expectations? Children are individuals and over time and with supportive environments, they will learn best at their own pace. Better quality learning spread over time than demanding and setting targets.

‘Let your child breathe gently and comfortably through their learning journey.’ 

-Gail J Smith

Supporting your child’s individual learning style

We are not all learning like robots. We all develop our own individual learning style which needs to be nourished and encouraged from an early age. If we block our child’s ability to learn in their own way it can inhibit their ability to learn, it will devour their self-confidence and their interest in learning will spiral down very fast.

Here are some sound reasons why supporting their individual style will accelerate your child’s learning: Let them take ownership of their learning style.

Optimised Learning: Tailoring your support to your child's learning style ensures they can absorb and retain information more effectively. This optimisation leads to better academic performance and a deeper understanding of the material. A child will remember much more if they are in control of their learning. The brain is wired to connect to the child’s learning in a way that will be deeper and richer if the child is in control of what and how they learn.

Boosted Confidence: When children are taught in a way that aligns with their learning style, they tend to feel more confident about their abilities. This increased self-assurance can lead to a more positive attitude toward learning and taking on challenges. A confident child will learn with more gusto and memorise the content for longer.

Reduced Frustration: If a child's learning style isn't accommodated, they may become frustrated and discouraged. Shutting down to learning could be the outcome. Understanding and supporting their preferred learning approach can reduce their frustration and make the learning process more enjoyable. Try not to understand their learning style and accept that it works for them.

Enhanced Motivation: Children are more motivated to learn when they find the learning process engaging and relevant to their interests and preferences. Catering to their learning style can spark their curiosity and enthusiasm for learning.

Improved Communication: Understanding your child's learning style allows for better communication between you and your child's educators. It enables you to advocate for your child's needs and collaborate effectively with teachers to create a conducive learning environment. Accept that your child is unique and in the classroom teachers know how to accommodate such variation in a child’s learning. Be there to talk to the teacher about how your child chooses to learn.

Personal Growth: Supporting your child's learning style fosters their ability to adapt and learn independently. They develop problem-solving skills and the capacity to explore various learning methods, which are valuable life skills. Your child’s individual style when encouraged strengthens their sense of self-worth and they value how they learn.

In summary, recognising and supporting your child's learning style can lead to more effective learning experiences, increased confidence, reduced frustration, enhanced motivation, improved communication with educators, and personal growth. A child will perform better when happy and are more conducive to learning when they feel confident that they know how best to learn. Give them space to experiment with how they learn and you will see a child taking more ownership of their learning.

What parents need to think about when our children go to school

As parents of children in school, there are several important concepts and considerations that you should always keep in mind to support your child's education and overall wellbeing.  These concepts are all about good parenting skills that help you keep your eye on that all-important issue of education.

Communication: Maintain open and regular communication with your child's teachers and school staff. Effective communication is essential for ongoing connection between the school and teacher. If things were to change you would learn about them quickly.

Support and Encouragement: Encourage your child's curiosity and love for learning. Provide emotional support and praise for their efforts, achievements, and resilience in the face of challenges. Be a positive parent who encourages their efforts and celebrates achievements of all sorts.

Active Involvement: Be actively involved in your child's education by attending parent-teacher conferences, school events, and volunteering when possible. Your presence and engagement can have a positive impact. Such involvement will show your child how you value their education and love learning. Be a partner with the school.

Consistency: Establish consistent routines at home to support your child's learning. This includes setting regular study times, creating a conducive homework environment, and ensuring a balanced daily schedule. Encourage your child to be part of the weekly planning of the family routine.

Individualised Learning: Recognise that each child is unique with their own strengths,        weaknesses, and learning styles. Support and advocate for individualised instruction when needed. Recognise your child in their own learning style and avoid labelling them.

Wellness and Health: Prioritise your child's physical and mental health. Ensure they get enough sleep, maintain a healthy diet, and engage in regular physical activity. Address any health or emotional concerns promptly. Talk openly about maintaining good health and encourage open conversation about what makes you feel well and happy.

Homework and Study Skills: Help your child develop effective study habits and time management skills. Encourage them to take responsibility for their homework and assignments. The more independent they are here, the more effective the homework will be.

Reading and Literacy: Foster a love of reading and literacy. Encourage reading both at school and at home, and provide access to a variety of age-appropriate books. Make your house a visual delight with books and magazines scattered throughout.

Technology and Media Literacy: Monitor your child's use of technology and media. Teach them responsible digital citizenship and ensure they have access to safe and educational online resources. Discuss electronic safety with the school as they have ways and resources to help parents cope at home.

Critical Thinking: Encourage critical thinking and problem-solving skills. Ask open-ended questions and engage in discussions that promote curiosity and independent thinking. Have plenty of games around the house and discuss news items that can lead to healthy debate.

Respect for Diversity: Promote an appreciation for diversity and being inclusive. Teach your child to respect others' backgrounds, cultures, and perspectives. Be open to invitations and show your child that exclusivity is a dangerous and narrow position to take.

Advocacy: Be an advocate for your child when necessary. If you have concerns about your child's education or wellbeing, communicate with the school and seek solutions together. Work cooperatively with the school and listen to what they have to tell you.

Lifelong Learning: Emphasise the importance of lifelong learning. Show your child that learning is a continuous and enriching journey that extends beyond the classroom. Talk about how you keep learning and what excites your imagination when discovering new facts.

Balanced Expectations: Set realistic expectations for your child's academic performance, recognising that success may vary from subject to subject and year to year. Also, focus on rewarding the efforts put into their work rather than the results.

Positive Role Model: Be a positive role model for your child by demonstrating a commitment to learning, resilience in the face of challenges, and a growth mindset. Discuss from time to time what makes you tick and find opportunities to show the way using common sense and emotional maturity

Self-Care: Remember to take care of yourself as a parent. Maintaining your own wellbeing and balance is essential for being able to support your child effectively. Also, your child needs to see that your self-care is essential for everyone’s wellbeing.

These ideas help you as a parent develop healthy and effective parenting skills to support their learning. The path is never even but keeping them on the right track steers them in the right direction.

‘There is no such thing as a perfect parent. So just be a real one.’

Sue Atkins.

The fun of joint projects with your child

Finding good reasons to spend time together shows that you are keen to build a strong relationship with your child. Finding projects that you can share together is not only educational but leads you both on a journey of discovery together. Shared projects mean you are both actively engaged to discover and learn new things. What better way than to show your child how you value learning as much as them.

In a shared project there is give and take and lots of healthy questioning along the way. It means that conversations with your child are rich and lead to happy negotiations between the two of you.

To find joint projects, look at things you do at home that can be shared. Think about what motivates you and what will motivate your child. Once you have a good sense of an activity that you both will enjoy then go for it. The project does need to be wanted and accepted by both of you. It will fail if the passion wears off quickly. Think about how your family operates and what interests them enough to join in with you on project developments.

Here are some suggestions:

• Gardening, setting up veggie areas together.

• Building a small cubby house.

• Fixing bikes and toys together

• Cooking, experimenting with new recipes.

• Doing a drawing course together.

• Painting the child’s room together.

• Building a major Lego set.

• Sewing and learning about patterns.

• Build a bird feeder.

• Art and craft activities with toilet rolls etc.

• Be involved in exercise together.

• Nature activities, setting up equipment together.

• Research together where next to go on holidays.

• Develop a family scrapbook together.

 The list is endless and is only limited by your imagination.

Together you are teaching your child more about the world, showing them new skills and deepening your relationship with them. You are also fostering teamwork and bonding. Your child needs to see how you value learning and want to share your wisdom with them.

‘Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.’

                                                       -Albert Einstein.

Teach your child about life from outside the classroom

Teaching children about learning beyond the classroom is essential for their overall development.

Here are eight simple but effective examples for parents to help their children learn outside of school:

Remember, learning from the classroom is only one form of learning in what should be a lifelong experience.

1. Nature Exploration: Take your child on hikes or nature walks. Encourage them to observe and ask questions about plants, animals, and the environment. Use field guides or smartphone apps to identify species. This fosters curiosity and a love for science and the natural world. Have you considered having all the gear? Bikes, walking shoes for hiking etc. Let your child know how you value outdoor learning.

2. Cooking Together: Involve your child in meal preparation. Teach them about measurements, fractions, and the science of cooking. Discuss nutrition and make it fun by experimenting with recipes. This enhances maths and science skills while promoting a life skill. Talk to them whilst cooking as maths is best taught through conversation, experience and trial and error. Have cookbooks lying around the house.

3. Library Visits: Regular trips to the library expose children to a wide variety of books and resources. Let them choose their reading material, whether it's fiction, non-fiction, or graphic novels. Encourage discussions about what they've read to improve comprehension and critical thinking. Just spend some time together reading at the library. Talk to the librarians who have much to offer.

4. Art and Creativity: Provide art supplies and encourage your child to express themselves through drawing, painting, or crafting. Discuss famous artists, styles, and the history of art. This cultivates creativity, self-expression, and an appreciation for the arts. Take them on excursions to galleries, art houses etc.

5. Home Gardening: Start a small garden together, whether it's in your backyard or on a windowsill. Teach your child about plants' life cycles, photosynthesis, and responsible care for living things. Gardening also instils patience and a sense of responsibility. Collect books on gardening and read them together. Visit special gardens that are on display.

6. Museum Visits: Plan trips to museums, science centres, or historical sites. These outings expose children to culture, history, and science in an interactive way. Engage in discussions about what they've seen and encourage them to ask questions. Let them look up various places of interest to visit.

7. Find the right moment: When walking together or simply watching television, you will find the occasion to talk about life outside the classroom.

8. Be Curious about life: Notice things and talk about them. Question why you see birds in trees and notice how the waves change. The more you seem inquiring about outside life the more your child will show interest and curiosity. They begin to be more observant.

Outside the classroom, you open the door to many more learning opportunities. Here you provide direct personal contact with nature which is enjoyable, excites the imagination and encourages inquiry. Outside the classroom knowledge meets adventure and children are easily motivated to learn and explore in a much more natural way.

‘From a very early age. I had to interrupt my education to go to school.’

                                                          -George Bernard Shaw

Managing our anger around our children

We all find ourselves angry from time to time. When we are around children. it is so important to manage and control our anger, especially when dealing with concerning issues. Anger is a powerful force. Dysfunction arises when you use your anger to hurt yourself and others. A child will read into our anger not the least of which is disapproval. Extreme anger can be frightening and is a violation of your child’s right to feel safe. Therefore, understanding that anger must be well managed around children is important for all parents to grasp.

Here are some positive reasons why managing anger well benefits relationships with your child:

Emotional Role Modelling: Children learn how to manage their own emotions by observing their parents. When parents manage their anger in a healthy and controlled manner, children are more likely to adopt similar strategies when faced with challenging situations. This is all about emotional intelligence. The more we understand that anger can be destructive and useless in resolving matters, the more we are using our emotional intelligence.

Healthy Communication: Managing anger fosters open and effective communication within the family. When parents express their feelings calmly and respectfully, it creates an environment where children feel safe to express themselves. This encourages healthy discussions, problem-solving, and understanding. When a child feels safe, that anger will not be a feature of discussions and telecommunications are more inclined to be honest and engaging with parents.

Positive Conflict Resolution: Every family faces disagreements, but how parents handle conflicts directly impacts children's perception of conflict resolution. By addressing issues calmly and constructively, parents teach children that conflicts can be resolved without resorting to aggression or hostility. This is where we listen with sincerity, negotiate fairly and affirm your child for engaging in this process. It works for everyone in the family.

Emotional Safety and Trust: Children thrive in an environment where they feel emotionally safe and secure. When parents manage their anger, they create a stable and nurturing atmosphere where children know they won't face unnecessary outbursts or unpredictable reactions. This fosters trust and allows children to approach their parents with their concerns and fears. Living in a household of no fear guarantees a happy and inviting space in which to grow and prosper.

Promoting Self-Esteem: Children are sensitive to their parents' emotions and can internalise negative reactions as personal failures. Self-confidence will easily deteriorate if they feel that their parents are negatively responding to them. By managing anger, parents prevent unnecessary blame and criticism that could harm a child's self-esteem. Instead, a controlled response helps children understand that mistakes are a natural part of learning and that they're still loved and valued despite any missteps. Harmful words live long with a child.

Increased listening: When there is gentle conversation and no stress connected to the conversations, a child will listen with more attention and interest. If anger is present children will shut down and their ability to listen effectively is reduced immensely.

Improved use of quality language: When we speak without anger and we are still dealing with issues the use of our language is important and is much more sophisticated than the use of angry words.

When you feel the urge to be angry around your child, take a deep breath and allow some time before speaking out. This drives down some angry intent and will lead to better outcomes when working through issues. It gives you more time to think about the problem and perhaps put things into a better perspective.

“Anger doesn’t solve anything. It builds Nothing, but it can destroy everything.”

                                    -Lawrence Douglas Wilder.

Seven ideas to help your child with homework

Homework can mean different things to different children. Some simply love it and others see it as a drudgery. Either way, finding ways to ease the pressure after school for your child is the best way forward in managing homework. Of course, it will be different for each child.

These ideas are suggestions to make the task of homework meaningful and enjoyable.

1. Homework Hangout Corner: Transform a cozy corner of your home into the ultimate homework haven! Add comfy cushions, good lighting, and all necessary supplies. Make it a fun tradition by letting your child personalise their space with posters or stickers. They may like to play their favourite music there too.

2. Timer Tango: Set a timer for short study bursts followed by mini-breaks. For example, 25 minutes of focused homework followed by a 5-minute quick snack away from the study area. This rhythm keeps things engaging and prevents burnout. It also gives them something to look forward to in short, sharp bursts.

3. Snack & Solve Sessions: Combine brainpower with delicious bites! Create a "snack bar" full of brain-boosting treats like nuts, fruits, and yoghurt. Let your child indulge while tackling their assignments - a tasty incentive to power through. Try to be more relaxed about food issues while they are studying. Too many pressures and controls can reduce their enthusiasm for the work.

4. Question Quest: Turn homework into a treasure hunt! Write clues related to the subjects your child is working on. As they solve problems, they move closer to discovering a small surprise at the end of their quest. This is really all about putting some joy into the activities. It also shows your interest in their work.

5. Study Selfies: Encourage creativity by letting your child take "study selfies." They can snap a pic of themselves studying in a unique way each day. This adds an element of fun and lets them showcase their creative side. Set up a board where they can write notes, put up photos, celebrate success and work completed. By keeping it close to their workstation they can occasionally look up and enjoy the moment.

6. Teach-back Time: Let your child be the teacher! After completing their homework, have them explain a concept to you as if you were the student. This reinforces their understanding and boosts their confidence in their own learning.

7. Choosing the best time: When is the best time at home for your child to learn? Some children prefer to do their homework in the morning before school. Others straight after school. Discuss with your child when they think they cope better with homework. There is no set pattern. However, watch that tiredness does not interfere with their homework.

Homework is always a complimentary part of their work. Should they come across difficulties that cannot be worked through, then do not linger on it. The teacher is responsible for setting the homework and it is their responsibility to help the child through the problem the next day.

Remember, the goal is to make homework a positive experience that nurtures your child's growth and learning. The above light and easy ideas can turn mundane tasks into memorable moments!

‘Tell me and I forget, teach me and I may remember, involve me and I learn’

-Albert Einstein

Six great ideas that parents can use to build their child's interest in learning:

For some children, school can be long, demanding and tedious. The key is to keep your child interested in learning and to be excited about what is possible. We can really encourage a love for learning by demonstrating how we love to learn new things in our own lives.

Here are six great ideas that parents can use to build their child's interest in learning:

1. Make Learning Fun and Engaging: Create a positive and enjoyable learning environment by incorporating games, hands-on activities, and interactive experiences. Use educational apps, puzzles, and creative projects to make learning feel like play. Show your children how you enjoy learning all the time. Set your house up for easy access to books and all sorts of learning materials. Make it a visual feast of all things that lead to reading and discovery

2. Follow Their Interests: Pay attention to your child's natural interests and passions. Tailor learning experiences to align with their curiosity, whether it's dinosaurs, outer space, art, or animals. When children see that learning can be related to their interests, they become more motivated to explore and discover. Have fun with them when they do projects. Here you can use all sorts of materials and discuss many and varied topics.

3. Read Together: Reading is one of the best ways to foster a love for learning. Set aside regular time for reading together, exploring a variety of genres and topics. Discuss the stories, ask open-ended questions, and let your child's imagination flourish. Have plenty of reading material around the house.

4. Encourage Curiosity: Create an atmosphere where questions are welcomed and encouraged. When your child asks a question, help them find answers through research, experiments, or discussions. This shows them that learning is about satisfying their curiosity and finding solutions. Play games in the car where you learn and discover about the surroundings. Make life a learning experience all round.

5. Connect Learning to the Real World: Help your child see the practical applications of what they're learning. For instance, involve them in cooking to teach maths and science concepts, or go on nature walks to explore biology and ecology. Showing how learning connects to everyday life can make it more meaningful.

6. Provide a Variety of Learning Experiences: Expose your child to a diverse range of learning experiences, such as visits to museums, science centres, historical sites, and cultural events. Exposure to different subjects and fields can spark new interests and expand their horizons. Whilst being consistent has its values this is about putting variety into their thinking processes.

 Remember, the key is to create a positive and supportive atmosphere that encourages your child to explore, discover, and enjoy the process of learning. Be patient, flexible and adaptable to your child's learning style. Always be ready to celebrate their achievements and efforts, no matter how small. Don’t be surprised when they come up with strange and wonderful ideas. Let all that flow into creativity and a love for learning. Finally don’t worry about mistakes being made. We all learn best from our mistakes. Here we grow!

‘Learning is a pure journey of discovery.’

                                                            -Gail Smith

What really makes a great school

We all want the best for our children’s education. We trust and feel safe in our schools and put our faith in their policies and philosophies. This is natural but also important so that the school feels supported and reassured that they are on the right track.

Here are some thoughts on what makes a great school. Keep in mind that all schools will present differently and as a parent, you need to reflect on how your child’s school is best serving the needs of your child. The best advice I can give is to always check in with the school when you have doubts or questions. They should be there to listen and to take your concerns on board seriously.

1. Engaging Teachers: Great schools are proud to have a team of dedicated educators who prioritise a child's growth and well-being, creating a dynamic and nurturing learning environment. The school staff in a dynamic school have an important mission in working together, planning together and above all connecting to the students.

2. Creative Learning: Schools should encourage creativity and this should be celebrated in various ways. Children should experience hands-on projects and artistic endeavours that inspire imaginative thinking and self-expression. As such their learning continues to expand and grow rapidly.

3. Inclusive Community: Fostering an inclusive and diverse community where every child is valued and respected is a key component of a great school. Here children can be themselves and be valued for all their contributions big and small.

4. Adventures in Learning: A great school values exciting educational journeys! They believe in making learning an adventure, with engaging field trips and themed activities that ignite curiosity and a lifelong love of learning. School is not all about the classroom.

5. Technology with Purpose: Embrace the digital era with confidence and hope. Great schools thoughtfully integrate technology into lessons, equipping children with essential skills while ensuring a safe and responsible online experience. Also, they actively engage parents in learning about online safety.

6. Healthy Habits: A great school sees well-being as a priority. It promotes healthy lifestyles through balanced meals, physical activities, and wellness programs that lay the foundation for lifelong health. Emotional health is a key component of their work with children and it should be present in all aspects of a teacher’s work.

7. Open Communication: Great schools inform parents well and offer opportunities for their involvement. Such a school values transparent communication, ensuring parents are always up-to-date on their child's progress and actively engaged in their educational journey.

8. Joyful Memories: A school that stands out is a treasure trove of heartwarming moments and lasting friendships. Here, children will create beautiful memories in an environment filled with laughter, camaraderie, and meaningful experiences.

Enjoy those school years with your child. They go quickly and together you can share some very happy memories where learning together brings joy to all the family.

‘Education is the passport to future, for tomorrow belongs to those who prepare for it today’                                                                      

                                                                      -malcolm X

Shining Stars of Parenting: Five Reasons to Embrace Your Success

We all recognise that parenting comes with challenges but we also should remind ourselves often that we are doing a wonderful job! We need that regular reinforcement.

1. Uniqueness is Nurtured: Every child is a distinct individual, and your ability to understand and support their unique qualities is a testament to your exceptional parenting. The fact that you recognise and celebrate their individuality sets a strong foundation for developing their self-esteem. You understand them thoroughly. Their originality began at birth. Remember!

2. Resilience through Challenges: Parenthood presents numerous challenges, and your dedication to overcoming these obstacles showcases your unwavering commitment. Your ability to adapt, learn, and grow alongside your child not only strengthens your bond but also demonstrates your resilience and capacity to provide a safe and nurturing environment. You will be challenged to change and to grow in your thinking. As the child grows you also grow. Be prepared to change!

3. Empathy and Emotional Intelligence: Your willingness to listen, understand and validate your child's feelings is a remarkable feat. By teaching them empathy and emotional intelligence, you're equipping them with vital life skills that will empower them to forge meaningful relationships and navigate the complexities of the world. Be a strong listener and be prepared to negotiate as they grow into independence.

4. Creating a Learning-Focused Environment: Your role as a parent extends beyond providing care; you are also their first teacher. Your efforts to cultivate curiosity, encourage exploration, and foster a love for learning create a rich educational atmosphere. This proactive involvement paves the way for their academic success and personal growth. You are their first educator and your modelling and supportive direction shapes their passion for learning.

5. Future-Driven Mindset: Your commitment to nurturing your child's dreams and aspirations shows exceptional foresight. By believing in their potential and guiding them toward their passions, you're laying the groundwork for their future achievements. Your unwavering support empowers them to chase their dreams with confidence. Allow them to explore, be inquisitive and have confidence in their growing voice.

Remember, parenting is a journey filled with both triumphs and challenges. Your dedication, love, and effort make a significant impact on your child's development, and these reasons exemplify the wonderful job you're doing as a parent. Be confident, be brave in supporting them and above all enjoy the process.

                         ‘Just loving your child brings it all together for them.’

                                                                                         -Gail J Smith

The Life giving Power of Politeness: Why Teaching Good Manners Boosts Your Child's Education!

In all my years as Principal and in my experience as a teacher, polite children always won the day! Such children are often popular because they speak well of others and provide no threat. They attract attention because their politeness is attractive and creates an illusion that they are in control of people who use intelligence as their main vehicle of communication. It is quite amazing how a polite child is so valued and attractive to others.

Here are five ideas to demonstrate how teaching good manners is effective and beneficial to the child, especially when taught by the parents.

1. Social Skills for Success: Good manners lay the foundation for positive social interactions, enabling children to build strong relationships with peers and adults alike. Polite children tend to be more confident in social settings, making them more approachable, likeable, and adept at resolving conflicts. These essential social skills pave the way for better academic collaboration and extracurricular involvement, fostering a well-rounded education. Never underestimate how politeness can make a child a lot happier socially.

2. Improved Communication Skills: Teaching children good manners involves emphasising active listening, respectful communication, and empathy. These skills not only improve their ability to express themselves effectively but also foster a deeper understanding of others' perspectives. As a result, children become more articulate and empathetic communicators, which bolsters their academic performance, participation in class discussions, and presentation abilities. A child with strong communication skills is a much more confident child

3. Positive Classroom Environment: When children practice good manners, they contribute to creating a positive and respectful classroom environment. Polite behaviour encourages cooperation, teamwork, and a sense of community, promoting a conducive atmosphere for learning and academic growth. Teachers can focus more on teaching, and students can concentrate better on their studies when the classroom is characterised by courtesy and mutual respect. By being polite, the quality of the learning environment improves. Children listen and hear better when the atmosphere is respectful.

4. Developing Emotional Intelligence: Good manners are closely linked to emotional intelligence—the ability to recognise and manage emotions, both in oneself and others. Children who are taught good manners are more likely to be emotionally aware and capable of handling stress and frustrations constructively. They read the signs very well. Emotional intelligence positively impacts their academic performance by improving their self-regulation, problem-solving skills, and resilience in the face of challenges. There is considerable self discipline demonstrated through politeness and this feeds into improved emotional intelligence. There is more interest in being grateful than feeling entitled.

5. Preparation for Future Success: Beyond the classroom, good manners are essential in preparing children for future success in their personal and professional lives. Employers often seek candidates with strong interpersonal skills and a respectful demeanour, making good manners a valuable asset in the job market. Additionally, individuals who practice good manners are more likely to cultivate supportive networks, mentorship, and opportunities throughout their lives. It’s as though in this ever-changing world, instilling good manners in your child's upbringing is a life giving investment that not only improves their education but also nurtures their overall growth and success. We could easily say that politeness is a measure of success in a world that can easily spin out of control.

As the parent, demonstrate through your own life how politeness has served you well. If a child comes from a family where politeness is valued, it then stands to reason that they will comfortably and confidently adopt that model.

‘Better good manners than good looks.’

                                                                                               -Proverbs

Eight Fun Ways to Enhance Handwriting Skills in Kids!

1. Artistic Doodles: Encourage your child to doodle creatively! Provide them with a dedicated sketchbook and a set of colourful markers or pens. Engaging in imaginative doodling exercises will help them develop better control and precision in their writing. It is also a fun activity that younger children especially enjoy. Take care to affirm their efforts as they progress through the stages of improving their writing.

2. Tracing Trails: Create fun tracing worksheets with their favourite characters or shapes. Use dotted lines for them to follow along and trace the letters or words. This activity reinforces muscle memory and fine motor skills essential for neat handwriting.

3. Sensory Writing: Make handwriting tactile and exciting by incorporating sensory materials like sand, rice, or shaving cream. Let your child practice writing letters in these materials, stimulating multiple senses for a more engaging learning experience. Children need to be tactile.

4. Storytime Calligraphy: Transform handwriting practice into storytelling adventures. Have your child copy short passages from their favourite storybooks or write their own tales in a beautiful font. This activity will inspire them to take pride in their penmanship. Use different pens and pencils, experimenting with shapes and colours.

5. Buy them a fancy book (perhaps leather bound) where their penmanship can be given full attention and value. Also, encourage them to handwrite thank you notes and to select the best paper and words making them quite a self-expressive gift.

6. Letter Formation Relay: Set up a relay race where each team member writes a letter on a whiteboard before passing it on. Use timers to create a friendly competition and motivate your child to form letters accurately and efficiently.

7. Digital Drawing Fun: Utilise drawing apps or interactive pen tablets to merge technology with handwriting practice. Children can trace letters on the screen, experiment with different fonts, and enjoy instant feedback that enhances their handwriting skills.

8.   Have fun with the children practising their best signature. Display them on the fridge. Encourage them to keep improving and talk about how that signature symbolises them.

Finally, patience and positive reinforcement are key when teaching children to improve their handwriting. Development can be slow but as they mature you will notice major differences. By making the process enjoyable and creative, you'll motivate them to develop excellent penmanship naturally! Let them see that you are making quite a statement when you send a written note to people. Let them see that their handwriting is all about them.

Our learning increases as we handwrite better. We own it, we created it. Therefore keep up with handwriting so that our memory keeps growing and our personal statement to others is clear.

-Gail J Smith