Relax, Parents: Childhood Is a Long Journey, Not a Sprint
Parents often feel the pressure to be perfect, but raising children is really about creating a space where they feel trusted and free to grow. Allow them to try, even if they struggle, because each small moment of autonomy builds lasting confidence. Your calm presence is the foundation they need to learn, stumble, and thrive.
Parents often feel the weight of “getting it right” every single moment. The truth is, raising children isn’t about perfect reactions in every situation, it’s about creating an environment where children feel trusted, respected, and free to grow into themselves. There is no rush. Growing up takes time.
Children are Smarter Than We Think
Your child notices how you response, whether you micromanage or step back with calm confidence. When you treat them as intelligent individuals, they rise to it. For example, a 6-year-old asked to help set the table may not place the cutlery perfectly, but the pride in their independence is far more valuable than straight forks.
Independence is Built in the Small Moments
Children naturally want to do things “by myself.” That’s not defiance, it’s growth. Let them tie their shoes (even if it takes forever) or choose their outfit (even if it clashes). Every act of independence you allow teaches problem-solving and confidence. They are happier in themselves when seeking independence.
Relaxing Builds Trust
When parents hover, children feel doubt: “Maybe I can’t do this.” But when you relax and show faith in them, they learn resilience. Think of a parent at the playground: one hovers nervously at every step; another watches from a distance, ready if needed. Which child is more likely to climb, fall, try again, and succeed? Have more confidence in your child and yourself.
The Long Haul Matters Most
Childhood isn’t about who reads first, ties shoes fastest, or gets perfect grades early on. It’s about building a foundation of security, curiosity, and persistence. Relaxing now allows your child to explore, stumble, and develop the strength they’ll need later in life.
So the next time you feel like correcting, rushing, or fixing, pause. Take a breath. Smile. Remember: parenting is a marathon, not a sprint. And sometimes the best gift you can give your child is the freedom to try, fail, and learn, while you watch with calm confidence.
“When little people are overwhelmed by big emotions’ it’s our job to share our calm, not join their chaos.”
What lifelong lessons do you want your child to adopt?
While we teach our children many valuable lessons throughout their formative years, some hold a special, lasting significance that will undoubtedly benefit them well into adulthood. Gail Smith wisely compiled a list of important beliefs and practical strategies on how to effectively impart them to your children.
There are many lessons we teach our children but there are some that will have a longer life and will be of much value if they adopt them when they are adults. For example, you may teach your child how to ride a bike but how does that compare to teaching them how to be a well-rounded person with strong values and a love for life.
Consider the following beliefs and maybe some may particularly resonate with you:
"You are loved unconditionally."
Lesson: No matter what happens, you are always loved and accepted for who you are.
How to teach: Show affection through words and actions daily. When they make mistakes, reassure them that mistakes don’t change your love for them. This creates emotional security.
"Your feelings are valid."
Lesson: It's okay to feel angry, sad, happy, or confused. All emotions are part of being human.
How to teach: Acknowledge and talk through their emotions without judgement. If they’re upset, say, "I see you're upset; it's okay to feel that way. Let's figure it out together."
"It's okay to fail; failure is how we learn."
Lesson: Failure is a natural part of life and leads to growth.
How to teach: Share your own failures and what you learned from them. Encourage them to try new things without fear of messing up. Praise their efforts, not just their success.
"Be kind to yourself and others."
Lesson: Self-compassion is just as important as being kind to others.
How to teach: Model self-kindness by speaking positively about yourself in front of them. Teach empathy by helping them understand how others feel and encouraging acts of kindness.
"You are enough just as you are."
Lesson: You don’t need to change to be worthy of love and respect.
How to teach: Regularly remind them of their worth. Say things like, "You are amazing just the way you are." Celebrate their unique traits and talents, reinforcing that they don't need to compare themselves to others.
"Challenges make you stronger."
Lesson: Difficulties and obstacles help you grow and build resilience.
How to teach: When they face a challenge, encourage them to keep going, reassuring them that struggles are part of life. Share examples of people who overcame adversity and how it shaped them.
"You always have choices."
Lesson: Even in tough situations, you have the power to choose how you respond.
How to teach: Give them choices from a young age, allowing them to make decisions and understand the consequences. Teach them that they can’t control everything, but they can control how they react.
"Take care of your mind and body."
Lesson: Your mental and physical well-being are interconnected, and both need care.
How to teach: Teach healthy habits like eating well, staying active, and practicing mindfulness. Encourage them to talk about their feelings and take breaks when overwhelmed.
"Be true to yourself."
Lesson: Follow your heart, and don’t live to please others.
How to teach: Encourage self-expression and support their interests, even if they are different from your own. Reinforce the idea that their happiness is not about pleasing others but about being authentic.
"Life is a journey, not a race."
Lesson: There’s no need to rush; it’s okay to move at your own pace.
How to teach: Avoid pressuring them to achieve milestones quickly. Help them appreciate the process of learning and growing instead of focusing solely on outcomes.
Simply use life experiences to teach the above lessons. There will be plenty of occasions along their journey to adulthood to test some of the beliefs above. Keep in mind that your example of how you live life will be an important guideline for your child especially if they see that you are happy in the choices you make.
“Every child deserves a champion- an adult who understands the power of connection and insists that they become the best that can possibly be.”