Let take a good look at why boredom can be a good thing

Our children at times are so overactive not to mention the incredible hours they put into their social media etc. If we can encourage our children to learn that less can sometimes be better and it can be quite a skill to learn how to do it.

Consider these ideas below that invite us to reflect on how healthy and positive, boredom can be in our life.

1. Creativity and Imagination:

   Boredom can spark creativity and imagination, leading to innovative problem-solving skills and a deeper appreciation for the arts. Just leave lots of magazines, interesting books and crayons around the house. Let their boredom discover what they can do.

2. Self-Discovery:

   Downtime without structured activities allows children to explore their interests and passions independently, uncovering hidden talents and hobbies. Let them roam through the garden, look outside the window etc. In order for them to be reflective, they need to just slow down

3. Resilience and Patience:

   Facing boredom can teach kids to be more patient and resilient when dealing with challenges or waiting for rewards in school and life. Sitting and waiting is something we all should learn to practice.

4. Enhanced Focus:

   Occasional boredom can improve a child's ability to concentrate, making them more effective at studying and completing assignments. We all need to learn patience and be prepared to wait our turn.

5. Stress Reduction:

   Unstructured time can reduce stress, anxiety, and the pressures of constant scheduling, benefiting a child's mental health and overall well-being. Don’t be anxious if schedules are not complete or you are late occasionally. Slowing down is healthy.

6. Quality Family Time: 

   Consider the importance of boredom in allowing for quality family time, during which parents and children can bond, have meaningful conversations, and create lasting memories. Idle conversations and no particular agenda when together can be a creative time for families.

7. Self-Directed Learning:

   Children can engage in self-directed learning during their unstructured moments, exploring topics that pique their curiosity and contributing to their academic growth. Teachers always give children unstructured time and it is well appreciated by the students.

Not filling every moment with activities allows the brain to slow down and recover from busy directions and messages. It also creates a wonderful space that can be filled by new thoughts, ideas and dreams.

‘Allow a little boredom into your child’s life and see how it works for them’

- Gail J Smith

The value of spending time and having fun with your child

Having fun with your child is all about finding quality time that is a such a precious and valuable way of building lasting and healthy relationships. Positive memories of childhood are often seen through those wonderful relaxed times, with no expectation placed on you other than enjoying each other’s company. Consider the following thoughts that give good reasons why this is valuable time spent in the company of your child.

1. Building Strong Emotional Bonds

   Emotional Connection:

   Spending quality time creates a strong emotional bond between you and your child. It fosters trust and security, which is essential for their emotional development. There is nothing more exhilarating than simply playing with your child.

2.  Nurturing Self-Esteem and Confidence

   Boosting Self-Esteem:

   Engaging in fun activities with your child helps them feel valued and important. Positive interactions and shared experiences contribute to building their self-esteem and confidence. They feel secure and confident that they are valued and that your time with them is precious.

3. Enhancing Communication and Understanding

   Open Communication:

   Quality time together often leads to better communication. It offers opportunities for meaningful conversations and understanding each other's thoughts, feelings, and interests. You are more inclined to listen to each other and to be less intimidated by what they have to say.

4.  Promoting Mental and Emotional Well-being

   Reducing Stress and Anxiety:

   Fun activities and shared experiences can reduce stress and anxiety, both for the child and the parent. Laughter and play contribute to a positive emotional state. The less stress the better and safer the environment for the child. We think more clearly and act more responsibly when less stressed.

5.  Creating Lasting Memories and Values

   Building Memories and Values:

   The time spent together creates lasting memories that your child will cherish. It also helps instil important values, such as the significance of relationships and having fun in life. Never underestimate the imprint you make as your child builds their tapestry of memories. It is well known that happy spontaneous moments can easily become life long memories.

We sometimes can become preoccupied with providing full on activities and experiences for our children. Remember that for them images of being together with you, relaxed and happy is the key to sharing lasting joy together. One of my most vivid and happy childhood memories is my grandmother putting a red tea towel on her head and doing a Spanish dance around the kitchen.

I was six!

 ‘Have fun with your child. There is much to gain for both of you.’

 - Gail J Smith

The art of letting go to gain more with your children

Have you ever noticed how your life just gets busier and busier?

In fact, the more complications, the more as a society, we think we are functioning effectively. How often I would hear school parents  say that their children were growing up far too quickly and that they were missing out on so much of their childhood. Yet they did not know how to change that situation.

There is much truth in this statement especially given that time moves so fast when we are busy people.

This article challenges us to find that time, by uncluttering life, so that space is created for your child.  It is not about creating more space, but rather, taking back some time from your already busy life.

This is a massive challenge for families. However, it is possible to declutter life a little to make more room for your children. It was not uncommon to hear children at school talk excitedly about plans that their families had made to simply be together. The presence of being together is in most cases all that children want from parents. Being present is the key to feeling connected.

Consider some of the following suggestions to reclaim time for the family.

• As a family, plan together those special times. This is quite common in some families to simply gather and plan how each week/fortnight /term etc. has adequate quality time for all the family. It is a matter at looking at what has to go. It is amazing how creative children can be when included in this discussion.  The mere fact that it is factored into your life suggests to the child how important it is to the parent.

• Draw up a list of all that you have scheduled for the week. Can you eliminate some of the activities to just be home with the children? Writing it down works for some families as they see and think about how relevant are some of the activities. Involving the children in this process is valuable.

• Schools provide busy schedules inviting families into the classroom throughout the year. These are great opportunities to spend quality time with your child. Schools understand the importance of building strong families.

• Be creative with your time together. When driving your child somewhere or shopping together, have you got time to stop off for a milkshake or a play in the park.

• Consider the layout of your house. Is it set up so that the children are visible? This enables more conversation, more connection and happy times together.

• Are there activities that you can share together? For example, if you like certain music, invite your child to listen with you.

• Bedtime is an excellent time to just chill with your child and talk about everything and nothing!

• Consider picking up your child early from school occasionally to simply have time together. This can be built in across the year.

• Lots of just sitting together and cuddling is quality time, uncomplicated by having to be or do.

          Try avoid saying to the child,

“I haven’t got time now.”

          Instead say:

“That’s important. I’ll find time with you to do that”.

With such a promise make certain it is always followed through.

• Keep a journal of those special moments together. Writing it down often stimulates the desire for creating more time together. Show the diary to your child.

• Take care with formalised sports. As parents we become very involved with them and this consumes time. However, think about kicking a ball around or shooting goals with them, yourselves.

• Set up a schedule on the fridge which highlights time together. This is a clear message to children of their relevance in your life across the week.

• Letting go of jobs, tasks, etc. is accepting that limits must be set on practical tasks so that you can spend more precious time with your child. How often do we miss the laughter and joy of those special moments as they grow from infancy to adolescents? The fatigue or tiredness we often feel is due to the far too many jobs we put on the list of “must do.” Such fatigue dulls our ability to enjoy our children.

As time goes, the relevance of those busy tasks fades into oblivion but not the journey and the long-term memory of watching your child grow.

You are modelling to your child, that setting limits on tasks and replacing them with building strong relationships with your child is critical to you as a parent.

“In family relationships, love is really spelled t-i-m-e”

— Dieter F Uchtdorf