Finding a happy balance for your child
We all lead busy lives. Sometimes those lives can consume us and we build into them more and more activities, jobs, special events, etc. It is in fact that our society rewards doing more and demonstrating that if you are a busy person, it is seen as success.
Our culture rewards and respects being busy. Of course, there is nothing wrong with busy. I would however, be recommending that you become conscious of the balance that you put into the week and this of course will flow over into your child’s perception of how a week should look.
Finding balance is a gift you can give yourself and especially a lifelong gift for your child. Some people are automatically drawn to putting balance into their lives, for many of us it is a struggle, especially when more seems better. Remember that if you teach your child to have balance between work, home, school, friends, etc. they will want that gift for the rest of their life. They will not be drawn to excessive demands and they will reflect on the various choices they are making that give them balance and make them feel happy. Here you are awakening their consciousness about being a happier person.
Once a balanced person always a balance person.
Here are some ideas to teach your child that balance is the best way to live out the daily, weekly, experiences. True balance is built on a solid foundation.
Show your child how you plan the week. Discuss why some things are chosen and others discarded. If you enjoy your recreation time show them how this is an important part of the week, one which is not compromised.
Keep a chart on the fridge which highlights the week’s activities. Talk about how some things must stay but others can go if the balance is to be maintained.
When you make a decision to let something go even though it was important, talk to your child about that action. Tell them that life can be flexible and can adjust to make for a balanced week.
Talk about how the school week is set up and how the lessons are planned so that a balanced curriculum is the order of the day. Children love routine and feel very comfortable knowing what is planned for the week. This is a chance to talk about balance in the school setting.
If something important comes up with your child, discuss how it would sit with the rest of the week’s plan. Will other activities need to change to keep the balance? What’s in their control? What is it that tips the balance?
Teach your child to reflect on themselves and how some busy situations can make them unsettled. Can they change that and do they really know their priorities? This is all about understanding that they are individuals and don’t always have to go with the flow.
Teach them that not everything is under our control. They need to learn what is in their control and what is not under their control.
Mindfulness talks about living in the moment. Perhaps teaching our children how to enjoy the moments and not focus on building busy changeable lives.
Some things are worth holding onto and others maybe not so. Invite conversations about what is necessary and what is disposable. This is all about finding balance that is controllable.
Cooking with your child is an excellent way to talk about balance and how the best comes from the balance of ingredients.
Building rituals into your life helps to strengthen the notion of balance in life. A ritual or routine is familiar, comfortable, predictable, manageable and in your total control.
Above all, be open in discussion about how maintaining a balanced life is a wonderful ideal and that in your life you strive to set goals to be as balanced as possible. Sometimes we fail but our plan is to try to maintain a balance so that you live a happier day, week, month etc.
‘Teaching our children to live a quiet, sane and balanced life is one of the most important parental tasks of our day’
- Brent L Top