Appreciating the appreciation

A young, enthusiastic Principal is always on the lookout for that compliment that just might come your way. It’s a little boost, that lightens the heart and gives you the reassurance that you are on the right track.

One morning, in fact over several mornings, before school, I would be visited by a small boy in my office. He had the most charming smile and grinned with an affection that made me burst with reassurance that I was being well-appreciated. In fact, how could you not feel so, when at each visit, he presented me with a bunch of flowers? These flowers were a delightful mix of colours and even an occasional dried flower appeared in the arrangements.

When I asked him how he managed to put it together, he reassured me with the smile of an angel, saying that his mother was a florist and helped him prepare the arrangement. Hence another feeling of reassurance that a family valued my presence. Things were working out well for me!

These wonderful floral arrangements went on for several weeks. How blessed was I and how comforted I was, to feel that I was so appreciated? After all, we all perform better with appreciation.

One day I was in my office when I was visited by a rather sharp-looking gentleman in a blue suit. He has a very noticeable label on him which made me think he was of some significance.

‘Good morning,’ I said in my usual warm and confident voice. A sharp reply came my way. I think it was meant to be a greeting, but it was followed rather indignantly with a very confronting statement.

‘I am a funeral director and we deliver flowers to the church next door when we have funerals to perform. There is some concern that a person has been stealing the wreaths. We think it is a child as we find the remnants of the wreath discarded in the churchyard. Do you know of any child doing such a thing? We can see that many of your children would walk past the Church.’

Suddenly my eyes swung to the little vases of flowers all around my office, some with everlasting flowers that now seemed somewhat contraband. It’s amazing how beauty can turn to horror in a moment's thought.

My secretary was standing gingerly behind him and with great skill, quietly removing some small vases which we now recognise as evidence to a crime. Secretaries have an innate ability to deal with crisis of all kinds, especially when a Principal is involved.

What do I say? Who do I betray? My role is to protect my flock and after all, was it not done in all innocence? How could an innocent child understand the complex nature of his crime?

Slowly and in a nervous voice laced with a principal’s tone I responded.

‘I can see you have a problem and it appears that you think some child may have done it. Strange’ I said ‘most of my children are driven to school.’

I now could feel my anxiety growing. Is this what a Principal had to deal with? After all I was trained for the job and integrity was the name of the game. I stumbled over the next few words.

‘I will certainly keep an eye out for any child turning up with bunches of flowers’.

I then thought what a weak response, but it had been said. Did I actually admit that a child was bringing bunches of flowers to school?

To my relief, the very surly man walked out of my office. He turned in the doorway and said: ‘Most impressed with your office. It seems alive with flowers. That is what all offices should look like.’

I was found out! A principal! Where was my credibility?!

The next day I spoke to that little culprit who had made my first few weeks full of reassurance and hope in my job. Was I now a disgraced, compromised Principal with a reputation for being deceitful?

‘Now Brian tell me about the flowers. I loved the thought but I am wondering where they really came from?’

He hesitated for a minute and then said,

‘Mrs Smith, I thought they would make you happy in your new job.’

Well, that was that. The conversation was over! How can anyone question such empathy or belittle such sweetness? Surely such a mature approach should exceed the responsibility of stealing a few simple wreaths.

As you can see my first few weeks taught me a lot of lessons. It taught me that we never presume what’s ahead and beware of that old enemy, arrogance. It creeps up slowly but surely.